[Go to site: main page, start]
Martin’s Substack

Martin’s Substack

Home
Podcast
Notes
Chat
Archive
About
Schnorrers awake! Free preview of Prime Kelner, showing later this week in which I perform the classic film Casablanca using only my own…
 • Martin Kelner
6:00
For those of you trying to cope with World Cup fever, a preview of the first few matches. Exclusive and free...
....although we do give you a little nudge about possibly subscribing (once a Guardian man, always a Guardian man)
 • Martin Kelner
25:29
Exclusive and free! Kelner's guide to World Cup 2026 based mostly on racial stereotypes. Plus what's the deal with white eggs?
 • Martin Kelner
25:29
From time to time I mentioned David Sullivan in my much loved and sorely missed (by me mostly) Guardian column. In this piece from 2010 I…
Karren Brady, therefore, was sidekick to two scrotal chaps, Sullivan and also Alan Sugar. The programme Junior Apprentice, Chelsea's 2010 cup win, and…
 • Martin Kelner
A repeat of a broadcast (sorry narrowcast) you may already have heard
It's the one about the BBC, David Walliams's lousy children's books, lambs'trotters, & the possibility of alien existence. Including your genial host's…
 • Martin Kelner
46:33
Free sample of latest Prime Kelner! Homing pigeons, Victoria Derbyshire & the BBC, & shock news on King Charles's todger
 • Martin Kelner
16:38
Free sample of latest Prime Kelner! Homing pigeons, Victoria Derbyshire & the BBC, & King Charles's todger
 • Martin Kelner
16:38
Martin’s Substack
Martin’s Substack
All the news that's fit to print, and quite a lot that isn't. Holder of several awards, and winner of a selection box of Shippams' fish paste from the Daily Express, but it's the Legion d'Honneur I'm aiming for with Un Podcast de Martin Kelner.
Recommendations
View all 6
Sceptred Dial
Sceptred Dial
Simon O’Hagan
Ashley Smith
Ashley Smith
Ashley Smith
Sporting Intelligence
Sporting Intelligence
Nick Harris
Nevin's Funny Old Things
Nevin's Funny Old Things
NEVIN'S FUNNY OLD THINGS
Catherine’s Substack
Catherine’s Substack
Catherine

Martin’s Substack

AboutArchiveRecommendationsSitemap
© 2026 Martin Kelner · Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start your SubstackGet the app
Substack is the home for great culture
    This site requires JavaScript to run correctly. Please turn on JavaScript or unblock scripts