time to lean

TIME TO CONNECT CANCELLED TODAY!

Crystal Britt, LCSW — Fri, 15 May 2026 17:05:35 GMT

Hey everyone! As Laura and I figure out what’s next for Time to Lean, we’re taking a break from Time to Connect. We were supposed to meet today but we are cancelling it. We will be pausing all paid subscriptions for now as well. If you have any questions please feel free to comment here or message me (Crystal).

[No Ads] what can we learn when we revisit couples therapy classics?

Laura Danger — Fri, 10 Apr 2026 17:46:53 GMT

Have you heard of the Gottman Institute? The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is a wildly popular relationship book and it has plenty of fantastic insights. However, some of the research and case studies could use some updating. In this episode, we take a close look at conflict while keeping in mind the weight of emotional labor and the impacts…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 129 when does teasing turn toxic?

Laura Danger — Wed, 14 Jan 2026 17:04:23 GMT

In this episode, we share a “candid” video from a couple who are having a serious convo in a #couplescomedy tone. We unpack emotional attunement, family dynamics and the impact of social media on all of us.

Mentioned in this episode:

No More Mediocre by Laura Danger is in stores on January 6, 2026! Enter here for a chance to win an early copy!

Don’t miss C…

Where have we been? 😅

Laura Danger — Wed, 26 Nov 2025 18:02:34 GMT

Hellloooooo!

Crystal and I kinda went dark there for a minute. Not that you were worried, but rest assured, all is well! Just too much to do and not enough time or energy to get it all done. Below, you’ll find more info about some of the things we’ve been getting into!

No More Mediocre: A Call to Reimagine Our Relationships And Demand More comes out on January 6th!
- My publisher is giving away early copies of the finished book. Enter the giveaway here! It ends in 12 days!!
- You can preorder a signed copy from Women & Children First in Chicago.
- Preorder from ANYWHERE and you can redeem an exclusive downloadable resource. (If you preordered a while ago, make sure to submit your info on this website so you get your download. It will NOT be sent to you unless you submit info.)
- The book launch event will be on Thursday, January 8th, at 7 pm at Women & Children First at 5233 N Clark St, Chicago, IL 60640
Crystal is running an AWESOME autism self-diagnosis group. If you’ve ever wondered if you might be autistic, this group is for you! A formal evaluation isn’t accessible to everyone. Not everybody WANTS a formal evaluation. Some folks may want to gather more information about themselves and/or the autism diagnosis process before deciding what they want or need. This group is for folks exploring any and all things autism self-diagnosis. Find more info about it here!

We posted a new episode today! Listen to it wherever you get your podcasts! Subscribe for ad-free episodes. :)

Subscribe now

We hope y’all are doing well. Thanks for being here.

<3 Laura and Crystal

[No Ads] S1 Ep 128 when does modeling better balance become capitalizing on the issue of inequity?

Laura Danger — Wed, 26 Nov 2025 17:18:15 GMT

In this episode, we explore the line between sharing personal growth and capitalizing on the widespread normalization of inequity. When does modeling a more equitable division of labor go from influencing a cultural shift to patting yourself on the back?

Mentioned in this episode:

No More Mediocre by Laura Danger is in stores on January 6, 2026! Enter her…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 127 what if men were tricked into going to therapy?

Crystal Britt, LCSW — Wed, 08 Oct 2025 18:59:40 GMT

In this episode, Crystal and Laura discuss an IG reel sent to us from a listener. Do men need to be tricked into going to therapy? What are some things that keep them from going? How do you even go about picking a therapist that’s right for you?

Get resources, ad-free episodes, and more at timetoleanpod.substack.com

Preorder No More Mediocre: A Call To Re…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 126 if i have to ask you to invite me, is it REALLY an invitation?

Laura Danger — Wed, 24 Sep 2025 04:29:30 GMT

In this episode, Laura and Crystal chat about a clip from the movie Knocked Up where Leslie Mann confronts Paul Rudd about his dishonesty around how he’s been using his time. We cover invisible labor, insidious inequity, subtle betrayals and so much more.

Here’s the link to the original video!

Get resources, ad-free episodes, and more at timetoleanpod.sub…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 125 is it funny to have to be begged to do the dishes?

Laura Danger — Wed, 10 Sep 2025 05:02:16 GMT

In this episode, we discuss a viral thread where a woman describes a metaphor for her entire relationship: a situation where she asked for more and was expected to be satisfied with less. We talk: self-sacrifice, relationship dynamics, small moments that really reflect big issues.

Get resources, ad-free episodes, and more at timetoleanpod.substack.com

Pre…

Time to Connect's monthly schedule!

Laura Danger — Tue, 26 Aug 2025 14:37:37 GMT

For the last year or so, we’ve been hosting weekly virtual meet-ups, and it’s been so wonderful getting to know so many of you! We want to keep these meetings going while adjusting to shifting capacity, so we’re moving to a monthly schedule.

These meetings are a space to connect with others, to share, listen, and troubleshoot. It’s a closed space that won’t be recorded! Paid subscribers can find the registration link below.

[No Ads] S1 Ep 124 is it funny to have to be begged to do the dishes?

Laura Danger — Wed, 13 Aug 2025 05:14:06 GMT

In this episode, Crystal and Laura talk about a viral video that makes light of the dynamic of "nagging". Join us as we consider not just what happens when you "ask a man to do the dishes", but what the jokes of the #couplescomedy genre actually teach us to laugh off.

Mentioned:

Revolution at Point Zero

The original video

Paris Paloma - Labour

Get resources,…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 123 was 'marriage story' cis-het propaganda?

Crystal Britt, LCSW — Wed, 06 Aug 2025 05:01:44 GMT

In this episode, Laura and Crystal discuss the 2019 Netflix film, ‘Marriage Story,’ which starred Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson. A popular clip is circulating on social media again and made us wonder: with all the passing of responsibility and finger-pointing and tantruming—was it all just cis-het propaganda??

Mentioned in this Episode:

Pre-Order Lau…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 122 would you leave someone on read for being too available?

Laura Danger — Wed, 30 Jul 2025 05:01:34 GMT

This week, we’re digging into a few clips from @leftonread_show that had us feeling things! We talk about what it means to be “cool" and whether or not the host's advice to play hard to get is ACTUALLY good advice. A lighthearted one today. <3

Let’s get into it.

—

Find more at timetoleanpod.substack.com for resources, ad-free episodes, and more.

Follow Laur…

Time to Connect MOVED TO WEDNESDAY!

Crystal Britt, LCSW — Tue, 29 Jul 2025 04:36:25 GMT

This week is a fluke and we are MOVING Time to Connect to WEDNESDAY at 11am Central! We hope you can make it!

[No Ads] S1 Ep 121 can an unfinished painting cause you to question everything?

Laura Danger — Wed, 23 Jul 2025 04:59:00 GMT

This is a weird one. Crystal has been slammed and Laura couldn't get a painting out of her head, so she decided to write(and read) about it. In this episode, Laura reads something she wrote about an unfinished painting of a mother.

PLEASE PARDON LAURA'S FRENCH. :)

Check out the painting here!

Madame de Pastoret and Her Son, 1791–92

Artist: Jacques-Louis Dav…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 120 is it fair to feel upset if i ask for help and your response isn't eager?

Laura Danger — Wed, 16 Jul 2025 05:02:20 GMT

In this episode, we talk about how vulnerable it can feel to name a need, the weight of perceived pushback, and how quickly it can spiral. We dig into what we call the nag paradox—that toxic loop of asking, resisting, escalating, and shutting down—and how it traps so many of us in a cycle of sacrifice, resentment, and disconnection.

Mentioned:

Wages For H…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 119 what happens if they ask how they can help, then don't like my answer?

Laura Danger — Thu, 10 Jul 2025 15:51:25 GMT

A listener sent us a video that hit a nerve: a husband asks his overwhelmed wife how he can help, then resists the very thing she asks for. In this episode, we unpack what’s really going on in moments like these. We talk about the emotional weight of asking for help, the nuances of saying no, and what it costs when a partner responds with resistance(eve…

Paid Perk! Join us TODAY for Time to Connect at 11am Central!

Crystal Britt, LCSW — Tue, 08 Jul 2025 15:35:33 GMT

Each week, we meet for an hour where we talk about what’s going on in our lives, present discussion topics to the group, and share resources. Drop your topic suggestions below and burning questions in our Time to Connect chat thread! During our meeting, we will bring our own topics of discussion, pull from chat and take comments and questions in the mom…

[No Ads] S1 Ep 118 if i step back, let him “rise" to leadership, and comment HUBBY on this post, will my partner finally make his own damn list?

Laura Danger — Wed, 02 Jul 2025 07:01:55 GMT

This week, we look at a viral influencer’s take on why men don’t step up at home. He's just one of many creators who exist in the genre of “relationship advice” whose content insidiously blames women for their partner’s lack of initiative. Apparently, the problem with a lack of effort isn't... the lack of effort... It's that you must be smothering his d…

Paid Perk! Join us TODAY for Time to Connect at 11am Central!

Crystal Britt, LCSW — Tue, 01 Jul 2025 14:55:43 GMT

“If we could just lay it all out…”

Laura Danger — Fri, 27 Jun 2025 15:24:46 GMT

We hear this comment all the time:
"I feel like if we can just lay it all out and get a realistic picture of what I'm actually carrying, we can figure this out."

The invisibility of it all is painful.
We know we’re overwhelmed. We know there’s barely enough time or energy to get everything done, let alone focus on ourselves. It’s unbearably frustrating when the reality isn’t being acknowledged.

There are studies that show we’re most satisfied when our expectations meet our experiences. In relationships, that kind of satisfaction often comes from being able to talk about things openly and adjust with flexibility. Equity and balance matter very much, but what that actually looks and feels like is unique to each person/household. An essential step in the right direction is simply getting aligned on what’s really going on. It’s information and clarity. There will never be a magic moment when you’ve found the “just-right” balance. Household equity is less about finding the perfect division of labor and more about building the skills to look at things together and tinker with it over time.

We know this isn’t simple. This stuff is emotionally loaded. It’s the work that nurtures and sustains us, it impacts us every moment of every day. And how we divide it is wrapped up in how we think about care work, how we measure our worth, what we prioritize, and what we were taught to value. It’s tied to core beliefs, personal capacity, identity, and the unique challenges each household faces.

We’re not here to promise a quick fix, but we can offer tools.

We put together a digital household organizer to help you get started. It’s an editable spreadsheet where you can outline daily, weekly, and monthly expectations, with space for notes on preferences, priorities, and accommodations. There’s also a reference list of common tasks with descriptions to make collaboration and delegation easier.

We also pulled together a recommended reading list if you’re ready to dive deeper. You can check your local library, shop indie at Bookshop.org, or use Libro.fm (this link gets you 2 free audiobooks that you actually own, unlike Audible, while supporting indie book stores).

Are there any books you’d recommend we add? Any podcasts or resources you’ve found helpful? Let us know!

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