Look for excerpts from book soon.

It’s my hope that you can continually find reasons to keep talking and sharing memories of your loved one. Remember you are the keeper of the footprint of their life. Record each picture, touch each random moment, keep an inventory of their life. Look at photos, write about them, say their name, hold it close. Always be open to stories and memories that others share with you. Laugh and love with those who knew their smile and the way their eyes twinkled with delight.

There is nothing I love more than hearing a story, whether it’s one I haven’t heard about Morgan or Kirk or one that I have heard hundreds of times. It never gets old.

Make choices in your life that honor your child. Make them proud of your decisions, as you choose to live in a way that helps others and honors their memory. Take an emotional risk. Take chances and say what you feel, hold back nothing, dance like no one is watching. Listen to music your loved one enjoys. Sing out at the top of your lungs.

We have established Morgan’s Memorial Scholarship Foundation, and we host a Golf Classic each year to help students fund their college education. But you don’t have to plan grandiose gestures to honor your child. I also honor Morgan in simple ways, like how I wear pink because she loved that color. By wearing pink, I have a feel-good connection to her.

Did your child love fishing? Hiking? Music? Or game night? Maybe they enjoyed going to concerts, sporting events, or theater productions. Whatever makes them happy, I encourage you to engage in those activities and find deep connection again with your loved one.

Every time I pull my grandmother’s beautiful crystal glass salad dish out to use, it brings a smile to my face with warm memories of eating Sunday lunches at her house with her fabulous fruit salad.

Recreating my mother’s recipes is comforting and brings me closer to her. Nothing reminds me of growing up at home more than my mother’s creamed eggs on toast for breakfast. It was such a treat.

Wearing my straw hats in the summer and my felt hats in the winter remind me of how my father wore his broad-brimmed Stetsen cowboy hat all the time.

My sweet aunt Peggy made me a stained-glass butterfly that hangs in my office window. Seeing the light shining brightly through the glass reminds me of her funny laugh and makes me smile.

The pink clothes, dishes, recipes, and all the hats are little reminders of the love I had for each one of these special people in my life. All these simple moments help create an environment of thankfulness for our loved ones, reminding us how fortunate we were to know them and giving us a chance to keep their memory alive with us each day.

I encourage you to gather strength from the simplest memories.

It will bring joy to your journey.

“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back

and realize they were the big things.”

Robert Brault

I just returned from a celebrations of life of one of my high school friends. Tillie Tiller was a woman of deep dignity, quiet affection, and unwavering faith who gave of herself as a Christian missionary in Chad, Africa.

Chad is located in central Aftica bordered by Libya to the north, Sudan to the east, and Central African Republic to the south, as well as Cameroon, Nigeria, and Niger. It is the fifth largest country in Africa. The average annual income is from $917-$2,990. Most of the jobs are in agriculture. (World data.info)

For 35 years, she served with TEAM, The Evangelical Alliance Mission.

She spoke French, Arabic, and Chadian Arabic as she ministered among the Chadian people. Tillie met them where they were, embracing their lives and culture with grace, and in return they welcomed her as one of their own.

Getting a degree in agriculture from the Univerty of Arizona, Tiller later attend Columbia Bible College in South Carolina. She studied French in Paris, France to help prepare her for her life’s calling. After college, she provided a variety of services for others. She drove a combine in Texas, taught school in Arizonia, and worked on cattle and pig farms in rural West Tennessee.

All experinces helped with her true life calling, Africa.

She devoted her life to the people of Chad, sharing the Gospel with compassion and love. She had an adventurous spirit and was always willing to embrace a challenge. I was blessed to see Tillie every few years when she returned home to Jackson, Tennessee, for a few months. I always looked forward to hearing about her latest experiences, and Tillie spoke of her work in Chad with the same joy and devotion as if it were her very first year. Though the early years required her to adjust to life without many of the comforts of home, Chad soon became the place her heart called home.

One of her greatest joys was the lasting relationships she built over the years. She loved the people deeply, and over time she came to know generations of families, becoming part of their lives as she attended weddings, baptisms, funerals, and celebrations throughout the years.

Tillie could do almost anything and carried herself with a strong, capable spirit.

Camel riding? No problem.

On one visit home, she delighted in telling me about the simple shower she had managed to create in her block house. With pictures and stories, she shared the long process of making it work despite many setbacks in finding supplies. That was Tillie. Resourceful, determined, and able to create something useful with whatever she had.

When it came time for her to retire, she was uncertain where she should live. Africa had become her home, yet she also wanted to help care for her aging mother, who at 97 remains active and strong. Though it was hard for her to leave the dear friends she had made in Chad, she returned home. After only about a year, she was diagnosed with a brain tumor.

Team Africa Coordinator, Rich Hoyt, “Tillie left an indelible mark for the Gospel on the Goz Beida Community.”

Pastor Tao Vaileck Elysee-“Because of Tillie, the missionary station and health center in Dourali, Chad functions and serves many.”

I have always admired Tillie’s remarkable ability to adapt to a new home and to love people so fully that she became a cherished part of the community.

Tillie was truly an angel on earth. She was a gracious, loving, and faithful servant to others. She will be missed by many.

Goodbye my friend,

Cornelia S. “Tillie” Tiller

May 30, 2026

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I was blessed to have had 20 wonderful years with my daughter, Morgan Leah McCarty.

Do I wish I had more?

Certainly. I cherish the precious time I had with her and would have wanted it to go on forever. But the bond I formed with Morgan cannot be broken, not even by death.

I still miss the sound of her voice and the stories she shared.

I miss the playfulness of her laughter and her love of fashion.

I miss her eyes full of expectation and wonder.

But I will live with her love alive in my heart, and the memories will last forever.

Each day, I try to be a “little more like Morgan”—more kind, more loving, more giving, more fun. The peace that passes all understanding enables me to remember her with joy and smiles instead of dwelling on the heartache, loss, and tears.

I’ve learned that it’s up to me to see the love that remains and to celebrate it every day.

I’ve found that, little by little, grieving parents can find joy again.

Of course, the transition isn’t easy. And it takes time.

Yes, the scars will remain tender for as long as we live. The pain won’t ever completely heal.

But that jagged wound of grief won’t always be the fresh, deep hurt it is at first. With faith and hope, it will transform into a constant reminder that we have survived unbearable trauma but that we are still here, living one day at a time in memory and in honor of the child we loved and lost.

I know it may seem impossible to envision a future without your beloved child. But let me encourage you to get up every morning, take a deep breath, and start the day without them in it.

Morgan’s “chair” at the dinner table is permanently empty. Her vacant room is hard to glance into when I pass. Her high school picture is still in view. All of this brings a flood of happy and sad memories, sometimes threatening to sink me again.

But I thank God for the occasional night when I see her in my dreams. Usually, she appears as a young child, playing happily, as she did when she was growing up. Following those dreams, I always wake up smiling, grateful to have had such a beautiful vision and visit, knowing that even death cannot keep her from me.

Though I will grieve the death of my daughter forever, my life is not lacking in joy and happiness. Just the opposite, though I admit it took a long time to get there.

Today, my life is exuberantly rich again, as it was before Morgan’s tragic death.

I live from a deeper place now, and I love deeper still.

Because I have experienced such immeasurable grief, I have come to know joy like no other. Since dragging myself back from the pits of pure hell, overcoming such intense pain and sorrow, now, when joy comes, it explodes with a new meaning and thankfulness.

You too can learn to celebrate each positive moment in your life with such robust gusto, taking nothing for granted. Knowing the sacred preciousness of life gives me more of a reason to be thankful for what I have every single day.

I hold on to the smallest, most familiar anchors.

I remember the everyday details that might seem insignificant to others but mean everything to a mother.

I remember her leaning against my shoulder, the scent of her hair, and the

feeling of her hand tucked in mine. I remember her laughter and the way she

rushed into the room, eager to share a new story. I still love the music she

loved, and hearing those songs always brings back a piece of her to me.

A paper mache angel hangs in my kitchen window and makes me smile,

reminding me of the delicate artwork she created in elementary school.

Her kindergarten painting of a queen wearing a beautiful crown is

framed and brightens my day.

I also use a mousepad with a picture

of her and my son on it, so even in the middle of an ordinary day,

I feel her presence close to me.

The angel, the painting, and the mousepad are all visual keepsakes.

They reflect the simple pleasure of life together.

I encourage you to gather strength from your simplest memories.

It will bring joy to your journey.

April 19-25 is National Library Month and it serves as a reminder that

a library is more than a building of ink and paper. Libraries

are among the few remaining public spaces where people can gather,

learn, and exist without requiring a transaction. They offer

everything from literacy programs to the quiet corner needed

to pin your first manuscript.

By preserving the written word, libraries ensure that wisdom is not lost to the noise of the present.

The power of a story is available to everyone, regardless of background.

Books offer a unique form of companionship. They don’t demand

anything from us; they simply sit and wait. When we open a cover,

we enter into a silent dialogue with another mind. It begins a

journey without ever having to leave your chair.

What kind of reader are you?

The Emotional Reader-feels connected to main characters

The Cover Reader-picks out books by the cover

The Literary Critic-analyzes every detail, loves themes

The Series Binger-can’t stop till all books in a series are read

The Book Hoarder- has piles of books ready to read, but don’t

get to them

The Library Lover-spends hours in library browzing the shelves

The Audio Reader-only listens to books

The Speed Reader-Finishes books in a flash

The Note Taker-jots down thoughts and quotes

The Classic Reader-prefers timeless classics

The Genre Reader-has a special genre and never varies

Read The Last Page Reader-starts at the end first

Staying up all night-to finish that book

Organize book shelves-by color

Reread-reading favorites over and over

Read multiple books-at the same time

Using anything for a bookmark-whatever you find

Carrying a book-with you everywhere

I’m a combination of book readers. I’m a speed reader which makes it

easy to go through books. I am also a book

horder, with books just waiting to be picked up

and read. I usually have a book with me

in case I have time to read a chapter while I wait at appointments.

I’m also a library lover and especially the Trinity College Library

in Dublin, Ireland. With rare books and manuscipts from

the 9th centuries, it is one of the most inspiring

places to visit.

Other elegant libraries include the New York Public

Library as well as The Library of Congress in Washington, D.C.

The Library of Congress has 39 million cataloged books and a total of

173 millions items including manuscripts, maps, music, and photographs.

These rare library jewels are beautiful and have stunning architectural

buildings designed to be a home to a vast archive of books.

Every reader brings their own history, their own journeys, and their own joys to a

book. This is why two people can read the same memoir and walk away with entirely

different lessons. Each person fills in the gaps with their own imagination and

memories.

Step into the stacks this week to see what’s new.

Whether it’s a fresh debutor a long awaited sequel from a

favorite author, there is always something worth finding.

Rediscover the magic of your local library.

As this year’s theme for National Library

Week 2026 says, “Find Your Joy.”

What happens when you finish a book?

Do the words stay with you?

Do you carry it with you?

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“THE RIGHT BOOK IN THE HANDS OF THE RIGHT

PERSON AT EXACTLY THE RIGHT MOMENT CAN

CHANGE THEIR LIFE FOREVER”

THIS BOOK MADE ME THINK OF YOU by Libby Page

2026 USA Today Bestseller

This opening sentence of the novel, This Book Made Me Think Of You,

by Libby Page shows the healing influence books can have on people.

This novel is seen through the eyes of Tilly, a widow, who receives a gift from her

late husband, Joe. Her story is one of growing and healing and takes place

in a bookstore. Her world changes when she receives a call from a local

bookstore owner, Alfie, informing her that her husband left behind a final gift.

The gift is in the form of twelve books, one to be collected each month for

a year and with each book is a personal letter.

Far from being random books, Joe has

has handwritten notes that show his voice to guide her

through the grief of the first year.

“ I remember asking you once why you loved reading so

much and you said that books can change lives.

I am determined that these will change yours.”

This Book Made Me Think Of You

These stories function as catalyst pushing her to slowly re-engage with

the world she has left behind.

KEY THEMES

· Grief

Page captures the grief fog, the exhaustion,

and the suddenness of loss.

She shows an intimate,and emotional journey of grief and rebirth.

There are moments of interruptions with her progress

and often she slips backward in her grief journey. This author understands

the state of grief and it is shown by Tilley’s stuggle with losing

her husband. Page also understands healing and the process to return

to hope and a promise of a future with Joe’s letters and books to

guide her way to recovery. What a lasting gift he left her.

Her moments of joy are side by side with depths of sorrow.

However, she balances the heavy moments with a lighthearted spirit

and the ripple effect of coincidences.

· Novels as Therapy

This novel is a love letter to books. There are over

eighty books referenced giving readers dozens of new titles to read.

“Reading has brought me a sense of escape through

some of the hardest times in my life.”

This Book Made Me Think of You

What books inspire you and give you hope?

I love anything by C.S. Lewis and find myself re-reading

selections several times. Others that inspire are Andy Andrews,

Beth Moore, and a feel good novel, by Allen Levi, Theo of Golden.

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**Excerpt from my book GRACE FOR GRIEF coming out July 7.

The anniversary day of your child’s death —their date—will be difficult. The grief will rise as the day approaches, and it will continue to be one of the most dreaded days every year.

As my first date approached, friends told me to prepare ahead of time by planning an activity that Morgan would have enjoyed. Some suggested I visit the cemetery to spruce up the resting place with flowers or mementos.

I used the time to reflect in the stillness of nature around me.

Every year that has followed, I’ve spent time alone on this difficult day. I give myself time to picture Morgan, imagining her at the age she’d be that day. I ponder…what would she be doing? Would she be married? Would she have her own children?

I grant myself permission and time to cry whenever the mood strikes me. While many people may tell you not to cry, and others will try to avoid tears, I believe they come for a reason. Tears can nourish us as we go through grief. I don’t deny myself the opportunity to cry or even try to hide it.

For me, crying releases the heavy feelings and gripping anxieties that build up within us. Tears free us from continuing tensions.

Equally as hard to face is your loved one’s birthday when they are gone.

Birthdays were celebrated big in the McCarty household. Morgan was born on December 16, which fell too close to all the Christmas events, so each year, we celebrated her birthday in October instead, hosting hayrides and bonfires as an annual tradition.

The first year we lost Morgan, I knew those months were going to be especially painful. Between birthdays and holidays, we were walking through a field of emotional landmines. Still, I didn’t want her birthday to go by without doing something special. So, as difficult as I knew it would be, I invited some of her friends to honor what would have been Morgan’s twenty-first birthday.

Nothing gives me more joy than being around her friends that she loved so much. While it was not easy to celebrate Morgan’s life in those first few months after she died, we did slice a birthday cake and share special memories. One of her friends, Kara, shared, “Morgan would love us all getting together tonight, and especially she would love the chocolate cake,” and everyone agreed.

Now, we celebrate Morgan’s birthday every year. It can be as simple as having her favorite meal or going to one of her favorite restaurants, but we don’t let the occasion go by without special notice.

Recently, I talked with my Grief group about ways we can celebrate the birthdays of our children. Some like to spend the day giving to a cause or a group that was connected to their loved one. Some take food to the local soup kitchen, others volunteer with a grade school class, and others invite friends and family to a special birthday meal. There are so many ways you can honor your loved one, helping transform your pain into a positive action.

One year, I decided I would go to the local bakery and pay for someone’s birthday cake on the day of Morgan’s birth (December 16). The two stipulations were: I was to remain anonymous, and it needed to be a child’s birthday cake. I had written the following note and left it with the cake.

Dear Mom,

Today is my daughter’s 25^th birthday and the 4^th one in heaven.

In memory of her, I paid for your child’s cake.

Please enjoy and make wonderful memories.

Hug your child tight and cherish your days.

You never know if this will be your last one.

Love,

A grieving Mom

As I was paying for the cake one of the clerks said, “I know you. You are Morgan McCarty’s mother. I went to school with her.”

To receive the rest of the story, become a paid subscriber. I have included a list of 10 things to honor your loved one on birthday or “anniversary day”.

A familiar panic began to grow in my stomach, as I realized my identity was blown.

Standing there in my gym clothes, I had nowhere to hide, so I told her, “Yes,” and she said, “Can you show the others her picture?”

As I got out her picture for the others in the store, the floodgates opened. I not only started crying, but sobbing. Soon, I had the entire baking staff crying too. The employees came from behind the counter, and we all hugged and shed tears together. As they passed her picture around, they wanted to know more about her.

Through tears, I explained, “Morgan died from a hit-and-run accident at UT when she was a junior in college. That happened in 2006, and we miss her every day.”

The girl who knew her said, “I was younger than Morgan, but I knew her from school. She was a cheerleader. I remember her smile and how nice she was to me, as a younger student in school.”

I had hoped to go into the bakery, make the donation, and take a quick exit. I certainly didn’t expect to break down in the shop. But that’s how grief works. Triggers can happen when we least expect them. That day, pulling Morgan’s photo from my purse became the trigger.

It was already an emotional day, being her birthday, but it didn’t take much to snowball me into a crying mess.

Sometimes the smallest moment can throw off the normal rhythm of an entire day.

Read more

Grief is an emotional journey. But grief is also a neurological and physiological event. Grief brain describes the cognitive disruption that occurs when the brain is forced to process an over-whelming event.

Symptoms include difficulty concentrating, forgetfulness, and impaired decision-making.

This reduced activity in the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for focus, planned and executive function, takes a backseat. The brain shifts its metabolic resources to the center for survival and emotional processing. This is why simple tasks, like reading a book, deciding what to eat, paying a bill, or keeping track of keys become impossible to complete.

Grief can manifest as short-term memory loss. We walk into a room and forget why, or we lose our train of thought in the middle of a sentence. This is not early-onset dementia. It is the brain’s cognitive load being saturated by the work of mourning.

While grief brain is a natural response, it can lead to secondary complications if not managed with grace and patience.

Symptoms

Physical exhaustion-disturbs sleep patterns

Triggers physical pain-Tightness in chest or lowered immune responses

Social withdrawal-reading, or conversation with a foggy brain can lead to isolation

Decision fatigue-The inability to make minor choices, memory loss

Impacts appetite and digestion issues

Overwhelmed with simple tasks

Grief brain fog can last from a few weeks to several months, or even up to a year. Grief brain fog after the loss of a child lasts for several months to a few years. Cognitive impairment usually subsides as one adapts to the loss. It is not a sign of permanent mental decline.

The important takeaway for anyone experiencing this is that you are not “losing your mind” you are mourning. The brain is not broken, it is busy.

Recovery from grief brain isn’t about fixing the focus. It is about reducing the cognitive load. This means simplifying life, accepting help and slowing down your activity and life.

The Grief Bain Survival Guide-reset your focus

Read more

The Madison is a 2026 drama series from Taylor Sheridan streaming on Paramount +. The series follows the Clyburn family from New York that settles in rural Montana following the death of the patriarch of the family, Kurt Russell.

Grief seems to be a character in the show because of the deep emotions the mother and family are going through.

Visceral reactions, outbursts, irrational decisions, lashing out at others, tears, a lot of tears are all seen on the screen as we see the vulnerable first days and weeks of loss.

Is this an acuate portrayal of grief? Absolutely yes, and you don’t often see it in a mini-series as raw as it appears on this show.

Grief this strong is usually left for chapters in books and hidden among most television shows.

Michelle Pfeiffer plays Stacy, the wife, and is mourning not only the tragic loss of her husband, but has regrets from things in the past. Her portrayal shows honest, naked emotions that gives you an intimate feeling of empathy. We are witness to her family unraveling from the devastation.

You get it.

You feel her pain.

I’ve watched the first season and readily await the second one. How will they turn

this strong grief force into a positive one? It will be interesting to watch and see.

The Pat Conroy Literary Festival was held in the fall in Beaufort, South Carolina. It marked the tenth anniversary alongside the commemoration of Pat Conroy’s 80th birthday. The event featured a weekend of bestselling authors and educational workshops.

Prominent authors in attendance included Adriana Trigiani, Patti Callahan Henry, Jason Mott, Chris Pavone, Chris Whitaker, and John Hart. Special guests at the festival were Academy Award-nominated actor Michael O’Keefe, known for his role in The Great Santini, as well as Cassandra King.

The four-day program offered guided tours of the Pat Conroy Literary Center. There were fundraising activities to support the nonprofit center, Poetry in the Park sessions, readings, book signings, exhibitions, author presentations, workshops, and a gospel brunch hosted at multiple low country venues.

During the festival, there were opportunities to network with fellow writers, such as Naz Pankey and Becky Bruff, who is affiliated with the Pat Conroy Center. Becky Bruff, a resident of Beaufort, is the author of Trouble the Water.

Patti Callahan Henry latest book, The Story She Left Behind, a New York times bestselling author of eighteen novels. She has a podcast and is cohost of @friendsandfiction. She enjoys interacting with guests and the audience. Her novels often explore themes of love, loss, personal transformation, and the poser of storytelling. My personal favorite, is Becoming Mrs. Lewis, based on the life of Joy Davidman and C.S. Lewis.

Cassandra King is an American writer and has written five novels. Her latest, Tell Me a Story, is a memoir about her life with her husband, Pat Conroy. The book tells of their 18-year marriage and their life together in the Carolina low country. It offers an intimate look at their great love, and their unique relationship.

Author presentations provided valuable insights and personal anecdotes. International thriller writer Chris Pavone shared that he sought advice from Pat Conroy early in his career, who encouraged him to listen to other people’s stories. Pavone’s debut novel, The Expats, became a New York Times bestseller; prior to publishing his first book, he spent two decades in the publishing industry. His most recent work is The Doorman.

John Hart has 6 New York Times best seller novels and writes thriller novels. All his novels, including Redemption Road and The Last Child, are set in his native North Carolina. A former attorney, he left that profession to chase his dream of writing. He says he has three passions in life, which are his writing, his family, and the protection of open spaces. He explained a thriller is what is going to happen in a book and a mystery is what has happened.

Chris Whitaker, a British author, read, The Lost Child by John Hart and that book changed his life. He quit his job and began writing. He writes about families with vivid characters, high stakes and people with emotional connections. His New York Times bestseller, All the Colors of the Dark, and We Begin at the End are currently in development for movies. He gave 5 pieces of advice for writing. Research and know everything your character can see, hear, touch, and feel.

“I work with three screens as I write. The middle screen is my manuscript, on the left-hand screen I would have photographs of the woods in Missouri in the 50’s and on the right-hand screen, I would have everything that the character can see, hear and feel. Every type of plant that would be growing, what the weather would be like. Every detail is used in my writing.” Using such details, it took 6 years to write All the Colors of the Dark.

The mission of the Conroy Center is to foster a diverse community of writers, readers, educators, and students. The purpose is delivering educational programs and special events that celebrate the transformative power of storytelling. The Center strives to broaden its impact through collaborations with local and national partners.

Attending the Pat Conroy Literary Festival offers participants an enriching opportunity to connect with acclaimed authors. People can immerse themselves in the art of storytelling, and engage in the meaningful discussions about literature and the writing porcess. Through a variety of interactive events like workshops, author presentation, and newtworking sessions, festival goers gain valuable insights and practical advice to support their own creative journey. The festival not only celebrates the legacy of Pat Conroy but also fosters a vibrant community of readers. From encouraging collaboration, and personal growth, you gain a deeper appreciation for the transformative power of stories. I look forward to the event next year and hope to return to the wonderful setting of Beaufort, South Carolina.

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What writers inspire you? Leave your answers in the comment.

Marriage is the world’s most expensive and rewarding masterclass in human behavior. It’s finding the perfect person and how two imperfect people navigate life together.

This is my 49^th wedding anniversary today and I thought I would share a few lessons learned from the days of matrimony I gathered from my experience and from others sharing their ideas with me.

Experience teaches:

• A marriage must have open communication.

• Practice patience

• Forgive each other and let it go.

• · “I’m sorry” needs to be used and often.

• ·Have fun and laugh together.

• Marriage is asking, “What do you want for dinner?” Every night of your life.

• · Putting the dishes in the dishwasher or taking them out goes a long way in the “impress me book.”

• · After you have been together so long our private jokes have a language all their own.

• If you say you will be ready in 10 minutes, in code that means 30.

• Likewise, if the ballgame will be over in 3 minutes, in code that means 30 minutes or longer.

• · I love you more than coffee, but please don’t talk to me before I have my cup.

• · We’ve survived 49 years of selective hearing and detailed storytelling.

• · My spouse is my favorite person to sit in total silence with while we both look at our phones.

• Show appreciation for little things.

• Listen to each other.

• ·Heros come in many forms-rescuing squirrels in the attic, setting up electronics at home, or getting the spider out of the bathtub.

• Marriage is the art of companionship and quiet joy.

• · Be an encourager and not a critic.

• · We have officially spent more time together than apart.

• · When you navigate the storms, you come out stronger.

To my husband Mike-

Thank you for putting up with me for nearly five decades.

I think we are finally getting the hang of this.

To my partner in everything: for the last 17, 885 days.

Journaling serves as a private, non-judgmental sanctuary where you can express your emotions of loss. Grief can feel like an overwhelming tangle of sadness and confusion, but the act of putting pen to paper helps to transfer pain into language.

Grief is a heavy experience and writing can be a powerful way to move that energy out of your body and mind and onto the page. I started writing my journal weeks after my daughter, Morgan, passed. I could only write just a few thoughts, not even in complete sentences. Honestly at the time, that was all I could do. About three months into my grief, I remember writing about the unexpected snow we had and how I felt when it was on her grave. It was like a covering going over her and something I had a tough time dealing with at the time. I wrote in my journal and found a peace knowing she was not there in the cold and snow. She was safe in her heavenly home.

I share many of the prompts I used during my yearlong journal writing and the satisfaction it gave me, even though no one else read a word. Some of these prompts were used when I needed to talk to my daughter.

· The Direct Connection

“The Unsaid Letter” gives you a chance to write everything you didn’t get to say and maybe explain things left unsaid. Getting out your intentions lets you have a moment of release to anything bothering you at the time.

Another prompt is” A Seat at the Table”. This describes a typical dinner today served with your loved one there. With Morgan, I know it would include some kind of chocolate for dessert. What would you tell them about your life right now? I would share my grief work and how there is a missing part of my life now that she is gone.

· Processing through Physical Senses

Grief often lives in the senses that are vivid to recall. These prompts are used to ground yourself in their memory. Choose one memory and list what you smelled, heard, touched, and saw. The sense I yearn for the most is hear her laughter and those memories are the most prominent.

One prompt asks about places that remind them of your loved one. Where did they love to go? A favorite store, park, or vacation spot can be remembered and write why that spot holds weight. I think Morgan’s place would be the beach. The sand and surf would be her favorite place to relax and enjoy.

Another prompt is to pick one physical item you still have. Describe its history, and why you can’t bring yourself to part with it. I wrote about Morgan’s jewelry. She loved a cross necklace that she got at church when she graduated from high school, and I wear it most every day. It is something tangible that I can hold on to and it reminds me of her. It could be anything from toys to clothes to a particular picture that is dear to your heart.

· The New “Normal”

Explore how you have changed since your loss. What part of you feels lost, and what parts are emerging? I will always have a part of my heart missing Morgan. That will never change as long as I live. But I do see the deep grief of others like I have never seen before. I do celebrate each day because I have learned that you are not guaranteed tomorrow.

Describe the specific time of the day when grief feels the heaviest. If not a time in the day, then the specific day of the year. Every year her birthday is hard thinking I have lived another year with her gone. Also, her “date” that we lost her is difficult. Celebrating birthdays and anniversaries in a big or small way acknowledges them and honors their memory.

· Self-Compassion

If a close friend were going through what you are feeling right now, what would you say to them? How would you comfort others in a way that would also help you? I would want someone to listen and just be with me in my darkest time. Bringing someone that would not instruct you what to do, but instead would let you share your feelings, not hide them.

· Creative Release

Sometimes direct reflection is too difficult to write down. These ideas use metaphors to bridge the gap. Imagine if your grief were a storm, a fog, a snowstorm, or a heatwave. What would it look like or feel? I can attest that my grief has been all the above. At times it is a storm and fury with my emotions. Other times it is dense fog, making it hard to see and remember details. The extreme weather of snowstorms or heatwaves can hit your grief unannounced with triggers that bring tears to my eyes. Your answer will depend on the season of grief you are going through and it will never stay the same.

Another prompt can be a conversation between joy and sorrow. A short dialogue between these two emotions as they coexist inside you. A never-ending journey of emotions which are constantly courter-acting one another.

· Their Legacy

What is a lesson, a habit, or a personality trait of your loved one that you find yourself carrying forward? It could be a holiday ritual they enjoyed that you continue each year, or a generous spirit in helping others that you continue. Did they like having a garden or flowers? A memory garden could be planted in remembrance of them. I have a scholarship foundation in memory of Morgan that helps students attend college that could not afford otherwise to go. Let the good points of your loved one shine on this journal prompt by remembering their positive traits.

I learned as a grief counselor that it helps to write your feelings to keep you from being over-whelmed. It is not always an easy task and many people struggle writng them down. A timed-release exercise in which you set a timer for only five minutes or ten and write. When the timer goes off, put down your pen, and close your notebook till the next day. Going back the next day can include another timed writing session. These short bursts of writing can help get you with a gentle start instead of diving into so many emotional situations.

Whether you jump in with both feet to your writing journal, or must be coaxed once a week, writing can help sort out your emotions and help process grief. By giving your sorrow a dedicated space to exist outside of your mind, you can begin to have a new “normal” with a sense of clarity and self-compassion.

Coming soon, excerpts from my book, Grace for Grief.

hoto by Andres Molina on Unsplash

What Grieving Moms Want You to Know

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We’re not strong because we choose to be

We’re strong because we don’t have another option.

We don’t need you to fix this.

We need you to stay.

We don’t want to be inspirational.

We want our children back.

And when we go quiet, it’s not because we are

Okay

It’s because the weight is heavy and words are

hard.

If you don’t know what to say, that’s okay.

Just don’t disappear.

Issy Roe

Bereaved Parents of the USA

For most of us, the XXV Olympic Winter Olympics

is a thrilling two-week television event filled with

stories of athletics and national pride.

But for athletes standing on those blocks, the Games are the

culmination of a calculated obsession in their competing field.

The commitment required to compete at the Olympic level is

less of a career choice and more of a total reconstruction

of your life. It is a passion and devotion to your sport.

There is a difference between interest and commitment.

When you are interested in doing something,

you do it only when circumstances permit.

When you are committed to something you

accept no excuses-only results.

Physical obstacles

The most visible layer of Olympic commitment is the

physical toll on their body.

While a standard professional might work a

forty-hour week, an elite athletes’ work never stops.

Every calories is measured, every hour of sleep is

tracked as data and every movement is scrutinized by

coaches. Competing at this level requires immense

physical discomfort.

Whether it’s lung-burnof a 500m sprint or the repetitive

impact of gymnastics, playing through the pain is a baseline

requirement, not an exception.

Mental obstacles

Beyond the muscles and lungs lies the mental grit.

In professional sports, if you lose a game on Sunday,

you have another chance next week

in another game. In the Olympics, a single

false move, mistimed step, or a bout of nerves

can invalidate four years of demanding work.

Athletes must forget their social lives, sometimes their

childhoods, traditions, and career paths,

for a shot at the medal that lasts only a few minutes

or even seconds.

Staying focused on your goals is hard to resist

the global spotlight and media noise.

With ninety-eight returning U.S. athletics in

the Games this year, the pursuit of every four years

thrill is still alive and well in their minds.

Financial and Social

Athletes put their real lives on hold, delaying degrees,

relationships, and financial stability all for a dream

with no guarantees.

Self-funding travel, paying costly coaches fees,

and findingsponsors help pay their way,

offers many athletes living in a bubble of their sport.

Outside influences are not an option for the

tunnel vision drive of the Olympics.

The U.S. athletes make:

$37,500 for a gold medal,

$22,500 for silver

$15,000 for bronze

medals in the WinterGames.

These winners are a small percentage of the 232 total

U.S. athletes competing this year.

Only handful will walk away with a medal around their necks

and their choice of sponsors to show for their work.

The Spirit of the Pursuit

The commitment to the Olympics is a testament to

the human spirit. It’s the belief that being the best

in the world at something, even for a fleeting

moment, is worth the price. It is a grueling,

lonely, and often thankless journey that only

becomes glamourous when the cameras are

turned on for public view.

The Olympic rings don’t just represent five

continents; they represent millions of

hours of unseen sweat and the will of those who

refuse to be ordinary.

I will watch in awe at the Winter Games in

Milano Cortina 2026 and try to remember

the long road it took to get there.

In the end, the true weight of an Olympic

medal is not measured in grams of gold,

but in the years of youth, the milestones

missed, and the quiet, grueling

sacrifices made when no one was

watching.

I like all the winter Olympic sports, but I enjoy the figure skating and the opening cermonies with all the pomp and thrill of the athletes beginning their Olympic experience

What about you? What is your favorite?

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Yesterday felt like a masterclass in “controlled chaos” as I stepped in to play botanical courier for a friend’s florist shop on February 13.

There is a special kind of high-stakes adrenaline that comes with navigating city traffic while trying to keep a dozen fragile hydrangeas from toppling over in my car. Every speed bump felf like a montain; every yellow light felt like a personal crisis. It was a beautiful day, about 60 degrees, and people were happy as I rang their doorbell with a surprise gift. Whether it was a dozen or more red roses, a mixed bouquet, or a small cut flower mix, each recipient received thier flowers with a wide smile and continuous thank you as I walked back to the car.

By the end of the last route, my passenger seat still smelled like a high-end English garden. Despite the frantic pace of the delivery route, there was something rewarding about being the person to bring an armful joy to complete strangers. There was a strange peace in the process.

It was a busy, fragrant blur of a day, but helping a friend stay afloat during the rush reminded me that even when things feel chaotic, you can still deliver something beautiful to make someone’s day.

“Life is like a ten speed bicycle,

Most of us have gears we never use.”

Charles Schultz

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If I can stop one heart

from breaking,

I shall not live in vain;

If I can ease one life

the aching,

Or cool one pain,

Or help one fainting robin

Unto his nest again,

I shall not live in vain.

Emily Dickinson

The death of a sibling is a profound, life-altering event that shifts the landscape of a family. Yet, in the clinical world of bereavement, siblings are labeled “forgotten mourners.” While parents receive immediate outpouring of support and attention for the loss of a child, and spouses are recognized for the loss of a partner, the sibling’s experience is often overshadowed sometimes to a secondary status.

According to the National Institutes of Health (https://www.nih.gov), the sibling relationship is often the longest-lasting connection of a person’s life, spanning from birth until death of the parents and beyond. The sibling bond is characterized by a shared history, a common language and a mutual understanding of family and its history.

When a sibling dies, the survivor loses more than a relative, they lose a living witness to their earliest milestones of growing up. They also must not only grieve their sibling but to also grieve the loss with their parents. Many siblings feel a need to hide their own mourning to protect and help their parents. Healgrief.org states that a shift in family role of being a “fixer” can thrust them into helping aging parents or help with the remainder of family members. For younger survivors, sibling loss can derail developmental milestones. Or if their only sibling is gone, it can trigger an identity crisis. The person is no longer the big brother or little brother. They are lost in their role in family identity.

Society views the grief of a sibling as a “lesser” than that that of a parent or spouse. They can be asked, “How are your parents doing”, before asking how they are surviving. Their pain can be seen as over-looked and not validated.

Sibling grief is a loss of the past-a shared childhood, the present- a companionship, and the future-the person who was supposed to be there for the rest of your life. To support, know that their pain is primary and should be addressed. By acknowledging grief, the sibling feels they are not left out in the mourning process. Like the parents, they should seek support, be patient with the grief process, and remember to talk about your sibling, share memories to help keep them alive.

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Mollie was an Osage Indian and went from being one of the wealthiest women in the world in the 20’s to fighting for her life from the hands of her husband. She survived the “rein of terror” of the Osage Indians in Oklahoma losing her 3 sisters, her mother, and almost her life, with possibly 100’s of other landowners. She was living in fear and grief as she watched her family one by one disappear. When mineral rights were found on the Osage reservation, members of the tribe made between $10-$30 million per year. This wealth afforded Osage individuals to live in mansions, drive chauffeured cars, send children to private school, even have luxury clothing, jewelry, and travel to Europe.

Land rights could not be transferred and the only way men could get their hands on the money was marry an Osage Indian and get her rights. White men, led by Mollie’s husband Ernest Burkhart and his uncle, William Hale, the mastermind of the murders, were on a killing spree for decades. They engineered a complex scheme to systematically kill off the Osage one family at a time. The men methodically stole their oil-wealth by marrying into the Osage families and then had them violently killed.

Mollie married Ernest, who was her chauffeur, and the plot began to get rid of the entire family. After losing her family to unusual circumstances, and no help from the local law enforcement, the Osage tribe wrote to Washington for help to the U.S. Bureau of Investigation. An agent was sent to investigate all the mysterious deaths of the tribe. Later this began the beginning of the FBI. The plots were uncovered, and Ernest and his uncle were arrested. Mollie fell ill and when she finally went to a hospital, a local doctor, not paid for by her husband, it was discovered she was being slowly poisoned in her diabetes medicine her husband gave her.

Mollie Burkhart: The Osage Tragedy and Enduring Strength

Mollie recovered, divorced her husband, who was tried and went to prison, and remarried and tried to build her life back. At 44, Mollie was no longer a ward of the state or needed a guardian to sign off on her money. Her granddaughter, Maggie Burkhart, said she could finally spend her money as she pleased, and she lived on the Osage Reservation with a period of happiness until she died in 1937 at the age of 50 from diabeties-related omplications.

Mollie came to life on the pages of a book and the big screen.

History suppressed the stories of the murders for decades. TheOsage suffered one of the most monstrous crimes in American history, yet people did not know about it. Until recently in 2023, a movie brought the saga to Hollywood with the Martin Scorsese directed film based on the popular 2017 book, Killers of Flower Moon, The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI by David Grann.

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So why tell the story now? Millions of people today all around the world are constantly putting their trust in other people. They are preyed upon maybe not for millions of dollars like the Osage Indians, but to be exploited and especially women, taken advantage of with little to protect them. Many people turn their heads and do not help or acknowledge the deceit. The Osage people had their secret kept from the world for decades, and like many others, their stories needed to be told.

Molly had a lifetime of heartache but also had determination to make things right. A true hero for the Osage people and for women everywhere.

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A Tennessee Christmas definitely hits a little different with usually a mix of Great Smokey Mountain mist, mild weather, turkey and dressing, and only dreaming of a white Christmas.

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me

A Partridge in a Magnolia tree

Two Opry Singers

Three Lightning Bugs

Four Vols in Orange

Five Golden Guitars

Six Beale Street Players

Seven Smokey Mountains

Eight Graceland Gawkers

Nine Walking Horses

Ten Nashville Hot Wings

Eleven Titans Tackling

And Twelve Dollys singing Jolene

Whether your “white Christmas” comes with many feet of snow, a dusting of snow, or powdered sugar from your cookies, sending holiday wishes. From the rolling hills of the Smokies to the banks of the Mississippi, may you have a wonderful time celebrating the season from my Tennessee home to yours.