At the height of my hyperthyroidism crisis, my heart rate and blood pressure were elevated enough that my doctor prescribed optional medication to shield me from these side effects while my thyroid function stabilized. When I sat with the idea of taking the pills, this created a sense of relief in my body, so I started a low dose. During this brief time period in early 2025, I monitored my blood pressure regularly. This was an unpleasant but important learning experience.

For reasons I couldn’t understand then, my body would ramp up just seeing the machine as though wild animals are chasing me. That feeling of the cuff tightening? ALERT ALERT DANGER THIS IS NOT SAFE! (Is it just me? Can you relate?)

I worked through some layers of this because I had to. I really wanted to make sure my heart was okay. It reassured me to watch my numbers resume healthy, normal ranges. As my thyroid regained balance, I weaned myself off the medication and continued to monitor my blood pressure and heart rate diligently for about six weeks. Everything remained stable, so I stopped.

Given this history, I was blindsided by the resurgence of panic at the idea of checking my blood pressure again. With this level of stress racing through my body, it wasn’t surprising that my levels were higher than they should be— especially my heart rate. That’s something I do monitor, and it was significantly above my resting heart rate. But I couldn’t rationalize myself out of it. For a few days my body was a pinball machine of fear bouncing from one spot to the next, especially when I checked my blood pressure a few more times.

I spoke tenderly to myself as I processed within and in conversation with people I trust. The origin story of whatever was getting activated inside me felt both genetic and connected to cellular memory from ancestral trauma and past lives.

The stand-out theme that emerged was an intense terror I would be judged, found wanting, and abandoned. This is unsurprising given the religious indoctrination that’s burdened around seven generations on both sides of my family. One of the central themes? You are born a sinner. You will be banished from the presence of God (i.e., Love) if you don’t follow the rules perfectly and sacrifice your intuition in service to external authority. (Okay, this is maybe an oversimplification. I wrote a whole nuanced book about it, but generalization suffices for my point here).

So I started talking to my heart:

Experience has taught me that physical integration takes linear time. I waited a week to check my blood pressure again. It was better but still elevated.

I’m definitely open to medication or supplements when needed. But when I meditated and gave my body my full presence and focus, neither of these rang any bells.

What was my heart asking for?

Like many of you reading this, I juggle a lot of responsibilities. Even though I generally like the disparate roles I play, it’s overwhelming. I’m doing my best in the wake of my thyroid lessons, but some days it feels impossible to slow down long enough to really rest.

Given my genetic predisposition to high blood pressure, I want show my heart that there’s a different way to process stress, that we don’t need to follow that old program. On the heels of this realization I felt a nudge to return to a meditation practice of 20 minutes, two times per day. I learned this method in a weekend class with a friend over a decade ago. While I still use the skillset, it’s informal and random.

I could tell this was IT because my heart seemed to sigh with relief. What did I have to lose?

It’s been almost a week, and wow, am I grateful to return to this practice. It helps me so much to start the day in deep listening within.

A couple of days I’ve missed my second meditation. And that’s okay. Rigidity is never going to resonate for me! It’s not about perfection but about building trust within.

This morning I saw the blood pressure cuff next to my laptop. I haven’t checked since I started meditating again. Honestly? I did not want to. But I do want to be “fear-facing” (phrase coined by brilliant teacher and author Sonya Renee Taylor). Right away, the decision to check activated my body. To a lesser degree than before, but still.

My reading was 130/74. I closed my eyes and dropped into the place inside where I meditate. I spoke to my heart again, “Please help me to understand what you need. There’s nothing to be afraid of. You’re safe. I love you. I just want accurate information.” I pictured myself as a giant redwood standing in the sun, roots deep connected. And I kid you not—a few minutes later, my second reading was 116/72.

Cue the tears.

Working through this experience is like “homework” from the Universe as I prepare for my upcoming retreat. There are 11 of us gathering so far!

Grandmother Elephant gave me the number 12 in meditation, and I’ve accidentally written 13 several times. This suggests to me someone is IN but hasn’t registered yet, while someone else is still on the fence. I’m trusting my impulse to share this story today in case it reassures either one. Registration ends June 5. I’m happy to answer questions. It’s going to be an amazing weekend!

All the Details

Love,

P.S. It’s vulnerable to share health details online. I want be clear about the boundaries I’m holding in doing so: I do not want medical advice, nor am I offering you any. Caring for ourselves is private and highly individualized. My only purpose in sharing is to offer evidence that dialoguing with your body is a powerful complement to any other approach you pursue. What that looks like for you (or not) is entirely within your discretion!

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You Are Who You Are, Who You Are, Who You Are

My oldest daughter loves to draw.
On days she doesn’t have time or make time,
she worries, “Will my gift leave me?”

My youngest daughter loves to write.
On days she doesn’t have time or make time,
she questions, “Am I still a writer?”

I tell them what I tell myself
on days time is too slippery to hold:
You are who you, regardless.

We ebb and flow, constancy sourced
not in doing but in being.
Our bodies are mostly water, after all.

Which is to say, we are fluid,
a timeless stream, free-flowing
back in, around, and home.

The first chapter in What It Takes to Heal: How Transforming Ourselves Can Change the World by Prentis Hemphill is called “Vision.” I can’t stop thinking about their call to investigate and clarify our deepest longings. Here’s a tiny taste, maybe some questions to reflect on as you fall asleep tonight.

If their words spark anything for you, too, please feel free to share in the comments.

I hope you are well. I know there is a lot to worry about right now, and that it can be overwhelming to try to source safety and peace within yourself, through your connection to the All. The more I practice this, the more I know it’s real. I’m sending you love!

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In the end, though, did abandoning myself ever actually help?

Nope. Healing my thyroid through intense emotional and spiritual processing helped me see through this illusion.

Let me tell you about a particular experience where my twisted concept of service and sacrifice came to the forefront.

Breathwork with Davel Patel

On a Monday in early March 2025, my women’s circle gathered at a yoga studio for a special experience. Davel Patel, a certified breath and Integrated Eye Movement Therapy practitioner, had recently joined our gatherings. She offered to teach our group the basics and benefits of functional breathing and then lead us through a demonstration.

Davel is a masterful teacher. When she speaks, it’s obvious: she sources expression from a deep well and is fully at home in her physicality. I loved learning from her how to bring curiosity and presence to my breathing rhythms.

At one point, the sixteen of us lay on the floor in a cozy sprawl— think grown-up sleepover vibes. Davel’s comforting voice continued to guide us through the breath journey. I softened into the experience and wondered what would unfold.

On my left, a good friend stretched out alongside me. Soon, I realized she was crying.

With the enhanced perception that always comes from slowing down and tuning in, I knew whatever she was experiencing was intense. My brain interpreted what I thought was her full-body distress as if it were mine. My eyes filled with tears, too. I immediately abandoned my own internal narrative as my entire being shifted focus to her. There was no choice point—this was instinct.

Oh no! This is awful.

Everyone, we need to stop! NOW!

She is hurting. We have to help her!

My brain screamed these thoughts at me. I wrestled with a powerful urge to yell them out loud as my tears increased. I started to shake too.

Davel must have noticed because she gently placed her hand on me, encouraging me to ride the wave. Throughout the evening, she counseled us to trust whatever happened, to step out of judgment, and choose curiosity.

Soon, I became aware that my friend’s breathing had grown calmer. I could feel through the unseen spiderweb that she was okay. I was relieved. But I struggled within myself. I couldn’t access my breath flow and meditation like before.

After the breath journey concluded, Davel invited us to share. The friend I’d been terrified for? She described a beautifully moving journey that showed her the power of grief and love in this lifetime. She glowed with the wisdom of her experience.

Whoa, did my brain ever get it wrong:

She was never in danger.

She was having the experience that was meant for her.

She was always held, supported, and loved.

When it was my turn, I broke down as I told these beloved women what happened to me. My narrative unlocked my lifelong struggle.

No one in the room had an “answer” for me. Instead, they witnessed me. They loved me. They trusted me to find it for myself.

If you’ve experienced that kind of space-holding, you know how transformative it can be. (And if not, I sincerely hope you’re able to.)

I didn’t figure anything out overnight. But naming the push-and-pull I felt, in a group of people who received my words without judgment, was a really important step.

A lot happened between that night and today. I don’t have time to write (and you probably don’t have time to read, ha!) all of it now.

What I can tell you is this: I’m finding my way. It’s getting easier to balance my responsibility of personal homeostasis with fulfilling my role as part of a collective ecosystem. Both are important. I matter. You matter. I see my relationship with the larger whole as an invitation to be the most expansive, authentic, heart-led version of myself—not one who makes herself as a small as possible. I can promise you it doesn’t help anyone.

Before I tell you about an upcoming opportunity to share space with Davel, I want to give a quick shoutout to Emi of , an astrologer whose free series on the significance of your Moon sign is honestly astounding. My natal moon is in Pisces. When I read this piece recently, her accuracy floored me. Emi describes a Pisces Moon person as:

“The helper who gives until there is nothing left and then feels guilty about the resentment, because resentment feels like a spiritual failure.”

OOF. Um, yeah.

Among other luminous nuggets, Emi offers this, too:

“The task of the Pisces Moon is to learn to live in the real world without abandoning the imagined one. To build a life that is structured enough to support your sensitivity without crushing it. To develop boundaries that are not walls but shores: firm enough to hold the water, porous enough to let the tide move.

This means taking care of yourself with the same tenderness you offer to everyone else. It means learning to say no, not as a rejection of your compassionate nature, but as an act of preservation that allows your compassion to sustain itself.”

Thank you, Emi, for your brilliant work!

Experience Davel’s Magic at My Retreat

I’m thrilled that Davel will also be joining us at the Befriending Your Body Retreat on June 26-28. She’ll be leading us through a breathwork offering specially customized for our gathering and never before offered in Iowa. We’ll be moving at a significantly slower pace and orienting attention toward subtle internal signals of the body.

From Davel:

Early bird registration for Befriending Your Body ends Monday, May 5. If you have any questions, let’s chat.

Love,

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Several nights ago, I sat at the small desk in my bedroom where I pull cards, cradling my swollen belly. I was bloated enough to almost feel pregnant again. I’d been struggling with gastrointestinal issues for weeks.

My physical discomfort was activating old stories I carry in my abdomen, home to my biggest challenges. Menstrual cramps that kept me home and throwing up in high school, difficulty getting pregnant with my oldest, three pregnancies with hyperemesis gravidarum, unresolved diastsis recti. I’ve been self-conscious about this part of my body since forever, no matter my weight. And my solar plexus has always been where I feel stress and tension first.

Yet I felt these words rise up during a late-night chat with my body while my family slept. My sincerity surprised me. Nothing in me doubted the truth of these words:

You have never failed me.

As I repeated this to myself a few more times, marveling at the clarity I felt, a tight fist in the core of me suddenly unclenched, palm open.

You know that beautiful gut release when you swap jeans (“hard pants” as my husband nicknamed them during the pandemic) for soft leggings? It was like that but on the deepest internal level of me. I’d denied myself this kind of peace my whole life.

No more!

My body is my partner and co-creator of experiences. All of my challenges have also been incredible opportunities to learn my capacity for growth, for exploration, for seeking, for creating something new.

What Helped Me Say It and Mean It

A week or so before this catharsis, the occasional bloating and gas I’d been experiencing for months had become a daily battle. I was baffled.

It did not seem to matter what I ate (or not) or did (or not). I’ve been muscle testing for about fifteen years. I know what it feels like to source solutions inside myself but struggled to find them. I asked my body to help me understand what it was asking for and pulled this spread.

In the center, Grandmother Rose offered to help me source unconditional self-love (an ongoing practice). Grandmother Octopus advised me to ground this energy by honoring my sacred no, except for sacrifices I want to make. Grandmother Brooke encouraged light-heartedness and laughter, which are more challenging for me than serious contemplation and alchemy. (I’m a rising Scorpio, after all.) Grandmother Sunflower recommended doing what I love. Lastly, Grandmothers Linden and Bumblebee were my body telling me to stop worrying I’m “doing something wrong.”

The truth is, before my thyroid crisis, I was making choices that did not support my body. This final message was especially reassuring because I worry about reverting to old habits.

As I contemplated this spread, I realized how often I “suck it in.” I only let my gut hang and relax at home. For the next week, I practiced overriding this subconscious habit throughout the day, breathing more deeply, and talking to my belly.

It is safe for you to relax, to take up space, to feel free. You can be as big as you want.

I knew these words were not only for me but also the lineage of women whose DNA I inherited.

Meanwhile, as my crazy bloating and gas continued, I educated myself. I researched connections between gut health and perimenopause, gut health and nervous system. I went down rabbit holes of leaky gut and microbiome imbalance. But nothing I learned felt like quite the right fix. When I checked in with myself again, it felt like my body was saying, “Just call Faith.” So I did.

Faith is my cousin, a naturopathic doctor. She’s helped me with different roadblocks over the years. I try to get as far as I can on my own first, but when I need help, her expertise is invaluable.

During our appointment, Faith immediately tuned in to the underlying physical issue: lymphatic congestion from old inflammation in my gut. It explained why nothing I’d been reading about was the right fit. She recommended hydrotherapy plus a specific strain of probiotic and digestive enzymes to support my system as it healed. She mentioned that resolving lymphatic congestion usually involves emotional work first, but that my body was telling her I was already handling that. “Keep doing whatever you’re doing,” she said. I will never tire of confirmation that emotional processing and healing ACTUALLY shift our physical bodies.

A few days into this protocol, the amount of better I feel is honestly amazing. My physical symptoms have decreased significantly and that will only continue. I could not be more grateful. Not only am I much more comfortable, but I’m also feeling better in my skin than ever.

Compassion + Confidence

I’ve always envied women who carry themselves with love, fully and completely. Whatever their style and size, they radiate a kind of magnetic confidence that is only possible when body shame takes a back seat. I’ve always wanted that. I’m done denying my body this kind of joy.

Of course, I am not separate from my body. The more I follow threads of my purpose and passion, the more this becomes clear. This weekend I’m confronting imposter syndrome for my upcoming retreat Befriending Your Body on June 26-28. Not because I doubt the value or power in the container! Frankly, the promotion phase of any project is always the hardest for me. I’m still learning how to navigate it despite my past successes.

Yesterday I bottomed-out and wondered if the retreat will fail. (I need three more attendees just to break even.) I even raged at my spirit team a little. Why did I feel such a strong call to put this together right now if it is not meant to be?

Then I pulled this spread:

No matter what happens, my homework is to be vulnerable, to bravely cross the desert toward my dreams out loud, in full view. What I’m curating is meaningful and will attract those it is meant for. As I long as I show up in integrity and stay true to my internal navigation system, it’s a win regardless of the outcome. I even pulled the “confidence” card from both of my decks, Song of the Grandmothers (Zebra) and Prairie Majesty Oracle (Killdeer).

Then, yesterday afternoon, I actually saw a killdeer! First time in years.

It’s been so long since I wrote the Killdeer entry for PMO that I’d forgotten its particular emphasis on how we interact with our bodies.

When I saw myself in the bathroom mirror a few days ago, I saw my belly pooch and suddenly exclaimed: You’re so cute! Again, I meant it. Damn, it felt good. I’m going to practice this until it’s my new normal.

I’d love to hear how this lands with you. I’m wishing you a restful Sunday and a week that brings miraculous support for whatever you’re working through.

Love,

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More wise women, more shared laughter and tears, more time-outside-time where daily responsibilities fade away so we can hear ourselves—really hear our deepest, truest selves—and each other.

By fall 2023, I was planning a second retreat and seeding something new: a monthly community circle for women.

Two-and-a-half years later, that circle is going strong. So strong we’ve now got two circles a month to accommodate growing interest. I cherish and adore the women who co-create this sacred space with me.

I want everyone to experience this kind of life-changing, life-giving magic. In fact, hosting retreats was a heart dream of mine even before I started creating oracle decks in 2017. And it’s coming true in the most beautiful way!

This summer I’m returning to Prairiewoods in Hiawatha, Iowa, for my fourth retreat. It’s going to be incredible. I would love for you to join us.

I spent about a million hours putting together all the details here. It was fun, exhausting, and honestly? Humbling.

Partway through my webpage marathon, I realized I was ignoring my body’s asks for water, food, and movement in service to “finishing just one more thing.” Oh, the irony of doing this while simultaneously trying to wax poetic about building trust with and listening to one’s body! I slammed my laptop closed and changed gears. Because, of course, I’m forever learning, forever figuring out what balance looks like.

But I’m not embarrassed to admit this to you.

Living my wildest dreams has nothing to do with becoming an external authority figure for anyone else. I know the transformative power of vulnerability and showing up exactly as we are to meet any given moment. And I know my body and I are in a dance until the very end.

Navigating my thyroid health crisis in 2024-2025 taught me so much. I’ve written a little bit about it here and here. One of my biggest takeaways? I will never abandon myself again. My body and I are truly friends now. Sure, we’ll get our wires crossed, but we’ll always untangle and try again.

I’m drawing on everything I’ve been learning and practicing for 15+ years to put this weekend together. Inside the safety and comfort I’m intentionally curating, it’s up to you whether to gently wade in or dive deeply in exploring how it might look and feel and unfold for you to deepen friendship with your own body. We’ll balance time together and alone, community discussion versus contemplation, and opportunities for both movement and stillness.

In the coming weeks, I’ll be sharing more. For now, I hope you’ll hop over to my website. It’s one of the prettiest offering pages I’ve ever designed, and I’m very proud of it! If you register by May 5, use the code EARLYBIRD to save $50. Scroll to the end of the webpage for other ways I’m doing my best to make the experience affordable and accessible.

Befriending Your Body Retreat

Have you been on a retreat? What did it mean to you?

Thank you for being part of my web. I’m grateful to land in your inbox.

Love,

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I mentioned last time all the ways water has been asking for my attention. In my private meditations, river imagery has been especially potent for me since January 2024.

I wish I had time to connect all the dots here today, to create a constellation that holds meaning beyond me. For now, here’s a poem I wrote in early August. I hope it offers something to you, too.

Flow

Immoveable, constant, absolute, fixed—
I am none of these, nor ask to be again.
I merge with the River carrying
me into uncharted water.
No landmarks to guide my way,
no signposts to confirm my location,
for the River and I are ever changing.

I ripple, I morph, I glide, I become
one with this liquid, living body
who knows the way even
when I don’t.

On the surface serene,
this water belies a depth
big enough to contain my churning
and yearning to make sense
of all that lies beneath.

When I can’t find words to stitch
myself into time and space,
I feel into the flow instead,
dissolve the edge that keeps me separate.

For I no longer wish to be alone,
holding myself apart.
Hoarding certainty in the marking
of who or where I am
will never set me free.

I surrender instead to the River,
where I become one with mystery.
Here, I am, awake and alive
inside the embrace
of all I am, of all I want to be,
and everything I might become.

Who knows?
Not I.
And maybe that’s the point.

What does River energy feel like and look like to you?

What helps you find flow?

A few weeks after writing this poem, I was thrilled to discover how perfectly a potent Energy Transmission from expanded my work with River. I highly recommend subbing to her Garden of the Imaginal: Creativity, Mysticism & Authenticity. You can also find her on Instagram: @mythsofcreation. It’s rare for me to find someone whose work I resonate with so thoroughly.

With my kids back in school, I’m excited to orchestrate a rhythm that allows me to service all versions of myself, from mom and attorney to spiritual seeker and sharer. It feels good to prioritize my creative projects again. I hope to return here more regularly and connect with you!

What are you prioritizing in September?

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P.S. With your oracle deck purchases, I was able to donate almost $400 to organizations supporting Palestinians, including Gaza Soup Kitchen and Medical Campaign x Sameer Project. Thank you for helping make this possible.

Lastly, here’s a recent Instagram post from an astrologer I admire on Instagram, Jonathan Louis Dent. I really appreciate how he integrates the significance of what’s happening in the sky with what’s happening in real time on the planet. May all people everywhere be free.

Ants have been wandering in my house much more than I’d like in recent weeks. I’ve been evicting them while wondering why they’d come back to me.

The answer I perceived: it’s time (again) for me to return to my work. But what is it? The theme I’ve been living for months is forgetting everything I know to remember it better.

I could write you any number of different essays tonight from the messy middle of this process.

For example, about my thyroid health. I left you on a bit of a cliff hanger in my last post from November. For now, I’ll share the good news that my T3 and T4 levels are normal even though I stopped medication in April! Miraculously, I avoided surgery and qualified for a procedure called radiofrequency ablation with a local thyroid surgeon. So far, so good. I’m going in tomorrow for my three-months-post-procedure ultrasound.

I also want to tell you about all the ways water has been asking for my attention. I don’t know why yet. Since spring, we’ve waterproofed the walls in our basement because of flooding last summer, replaced our leaky water heater, and updated various water shut offs in bathrooms and laundry due to drips. Last week, water poured into a basement storage room from the ceiling in multiple spots. (Turns out the contractor who installed new flooring above this accidentally punctured a water line when he nailed in the trim.) That day, I discovered our new dehumidifier in the basement closet is also leaking. Today’s problem? Emerging water stains in our dining room ceiling, directly under the tub in my girls’ bathroom upstairs.

Something else I want to share is how much I’ve learned about fear in the last few months, how my body and spirit have been working closely together to teach me to grow BIG BIG BIG during waves of panic and overwhelm.

I could also write for hours about interrogating the way I approach oracle readings, how my capacity for extrasensory impressions is expanding and contracting and expanding again. I received amazing readings in May with two very different psychic mediums (my first experiences) that dramatically widened my perspective about what’s possible for me in the future.

Here's another thing I’m exploring: building confidence in my singing voice. I feel called to incorporate music into the spaces I hold, from my steadily-growing women’s circle to workshops and retreats. This feels integral to my future work. It also feels possible because of the layers of healing I experienced with my thyroid, who lives next-door to my vocal cords. Last night, I asked a musician friend about taking lessons with her in the fall. Hooray!

I also want to write to you about creativity, how inspired I am by incredible friends who devote time, energy, and courage to executing their crafts even though so much is breaking down and breaking apart in the world.

“Joy is an act of resistance.”

— Toi Derricotte, African American Poet

Last but not least, I want to weave space for you inside this web, too. Room for you to share what you’re experiencing, how you’re breathing through it, what you want to discuss here. Are any of the topics I mentioned of particular interest to you?

Most days, it feels like there will never be enough time.

The spider I saw tonight reminded me to practice what she and the ants have taught me for years: start creating right where I am, even if it’s small, and expand from there.

I miss connecting with you.

I hope you’re surviving the hard that’s happening all around. Remember you are wise and powerful! Every day is a chance to choose what kind of future you want to help build. You can always start small, start over, start again.

Love,

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Ta-da! I’m healed!

Instead, I’m going to tell you about finding peace in the middle chapters.

Of course, you’ll need the opening chapters first. Until now, I’ve kept them private online, partly to shield myself from unwanted advice or interference, and mostly because I didn’t really understand the story I was experiencing. It felt too raw, too vulnerable, to invite you into my fear and confusion in real time.

Even when things began to shift this fall, I hesitated to return here and write.

This was supposed to be a banner year for me and my creative business. After my wonderful experience hosting a booth at the Iowa Metaphysical Fair in May, I couldn’t wait to do more. I fantasized about traveling to venues in the Midwest and connecting with new folks in the ways I love best. I’d lined up several workshops at my favorite nature center and was about to announce a monthly card reading event at a much-loved local coffee shop. I’d met with the artist to talk about a new deck! I was going to release my first book!

When I cancelled all of these plans in June, which was absolutely the right call, my momentum (not to mention my understanding of myself and my purpose, NBD) went offline, too. I spent most of the summer at home, physically doing the absolute bare minimum and spiritually excavating/exploring the deepest places inside myself. I learned how to rest, truly. I cried, a lot. I was scared, a lot.

It was my personal, on-the-inside version of What Not to Wear, that old TLC makeover show, under a new name: What Not to Do. I deleted all the social media apps, overhauled my diet, gave up caffeine and sugar (RIP), and took a long, hard look in the mirror of my daily habits, many of which were not serving me. Most importantly, I learned how to stay in my body when my mind panics.

Hold on, maybe a better name for my makeover show is How to Be.

Okay, so how does this relate to why I’ve hesitated to write here?

I didn’t know where to start or what to say. And, to be honest, I worried no one would care or even read it. After all, I’d disappeared and broken the “rules” in growing or marketing a business: Be consistent. Show up. Maximize potential.

It felt easier and safer to wait until I had a resounding success story to share, the kind defined by achieving completion and finding closure. What I’m realizing in writing to you today is that I do have a success story to share, and I’m really happy to finally start sharing it. It’s just a different kind of success.

By now you might be thinking, Kara, just tell us already. Here goes.

In May, routine bloodwork revealed my thyroid hormones were off. Like, way off. My provider urged me to get tests straightaway to rule out a cyst or tumor.

In June, more bloodwork and an ultrasound showed the cause was not autoimmune but large nodules, particularly on one side.

In July, I visited the Nuclear Medicine department at my local hospital (might be time for a name rebrand, yes?) to swallow a small amount of radioactive iodine and then return for multiple scans over the course of two days in order to determine if the nodules were “active” and causing my hyperthyroidism. Yep. This was good news. It confirmed the nodules were benign. One of my grandparents had thyroid cancer that contributed to their death, and I spent a good chunk of this summer’s waiting game terrified of such a diagnosis.

Quick aside because I can’t tell a story in a straight line and we all have to be who we are: After sitting with my fear for weeks, Grandmother Tornado from Song of the Grandmothers and Great Blue Heron from Prairie Majesty Oracle took me into the eye of my stormy terror—sobbing and feeling throughout my body the imaginal experience of dying young and leaving my kids without a mother—which was so hard and so helpful. I could touch grass again.

When I merged with my deepest fear instead of pushing it away, I suddenly knew, on an ordinary Monday, that it would not be cancer. The tests were a few days later, and I would know results in a week. I asked the Universe to send me a sign before then. Several specific signs in fact: a male and female mallard duck and three ducklings. Within hours, my mom sent me a video and included the duck emoji in her text. My first sign! Later I realized I’d forgotten to watch the video. It featured a mommy mallard and many ducklings on a lakeshore. All of my signs! The same day even!

The thyroid surgeon who shared the results of my hospital test recommended a partial thyroidectomy or referral to endocrinology to start meds. More than anything, I wanted to keep my thyroid. Throughout these months, we’d become friends. (Another time I’ll share more about our communications.) When I asked the thyroid surgeon if it was possible to heal my condition, he exclaimed, “Of course not. It’s a toxic nodule! It’s trying to kill you!”

Yet throughout all of these months, every time I checked in with myself, the path that resonated most was finding healing through supporting my body in natural and holistic ways. Alongside engaging with Western medicine, I was also working with my cousin, a naturopathic doctor. To help decide what to do next, we did another round of bloodwork in August to check my TSH, T3 and T4 levels.

Overall, I felt much better and hoped the bloodwork would confirm my healing.

While the lab work showed improvement, it was not significant. I felt defeated, like everything I’d been doing was for naught. That night, I put myself back into the eye of Grandmother Tornado’s swirling energy to cry and ask for help.

For years, my practice in talking with my body was asking yes or no questions. That night, a new approach dropped into my mind. Imagine three rosebuds, each color representing a different choice: white for meds, purple for surgery, and red for persevering on the natural healing path (which so far involved various supplements, prioritizing rest, and major emotional/spiritual processing). Immediately, the purple rosebud withered, ruling out surgery. Next, the white rose quickly and fully bloomed. The red rose bloomed too, but it was slower. I resigned myself to starting meds.

When I spoke with my cousin the next day about the lab work, I realized that I’d assumed—without asking my body/mind/spirit—that the white rose was the “best” option solely because it was the fastest. This, along with other experiences throughout the summer, taught me how important it is to approach these kinds of communications with an “all options are on the table” approach and to always ask follow-up questions. It also helped me find peace in ultimately taking meds if that’s what my body needed.

However, because my symptoms were so much better, and I was experiencing positive effects of working closely with my thyroid on an energetic level, we decided to carry on for a couple of months and then retest levels. In the meantime, I requested a referral to endocrinology from the thyroid surgeon because appointments are several months out.

This month, new bloodwork showed my levels are still high. (I’d been hoping for the opposite result so that I could wrap this story for you with that tidy bow I mentioned). I was shocked and curious, given how much better I truly feel. Although I’m continuing to do my work on a holistic level, it also felt like the right time to start a small dose of meds while waiting to see endocrinology. Everything I’d processed and created capacity for inside myself made this decision easier. I felt peace.

Still, a lifelong fear of pharmaceutical drugs, gave me pause when I picked up the prescription two weeks ago today. As I arrived home, I was asking the Universe for another sign, something to reassure me this was the next right step in my path.

I could not believe what happened next!

I looked out my kitchen window to see a white-tailed deer munching on the remnants of our summer garden. In PMO, White-Tailed Deer is the most self-trust card in a very pro-self-trust deck. Seeing deer is not a regular occurrence at my house either. The last time was probably eight or nine years ago! Thank you, Universe.

Another thing that helped me was remembering what a dear friend told me earlier this summer about taking a pharmaceutical drug short-term with the mindset of it teaching her body a new way to be. I loved that so much.

Now, when I take my thyroid med, I imagine it’s an aerobic instructor going inside of me and asking my thyroid to mirror new movements. Thanks to another friend, the med is dressed in neon workout gear from the eighties. Sometimes, after I swallow the pill, I dance like no one’s watching to a pop song from that decade. It feels so good!

Even though there are times I still yearn to be on the “other side” of all of this, I’m full of gratitude for everything that’s happened and all of the support I’ve had the privilege of receiving. It’s a gift to notice how I can hold all of it now, in much different ways than I thought possible before. No part of it was unnecessary— just more stepping stones in the winding spiral that has no ending.

Thank you so much for reading.

How are you? Can you relate? Do you want to know more?

I always love to hear from you.

P.S. I still feel vulnerable posting this, but intimacy is the mother of connection—the kind that helps each of us feel less alone—and that’s what I’m sharing. However my story lands with you, I’ll add this friendly reminder that everyone’s health journey looks different. I respect the choices you make for yourself and appreciate you doing the same for me! Each of us gets to decide what is the next right step, and I’m cheering for you whatever yours looks like.

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I asked my team of spirit beings for a message about this 8/8/8.

My team: Hold on.

Me: To what?

My team: Hope.

A few weeks ago, when I asked my frantic heart what it needed most, I received a similar answer: “hope.”

This summer has been extraordinarily challenging for me. I’m not ready to talk about it publicly yet, in part because I’m only partway across the dividing line between caterpillar goo and butterfly.

Something I’ve been thinking about, though, is hope as a panacea for all ills. Not because it cures or resolves the underlying issue. It doesn’t, not always. The magic of hope, at least for me, is belief in CHANGE. When something is awful, I can remind myself that it won’t last forever. Even if what comes next is hard, too, it will be a different kind of hard, and I’ll carry the wisdom I earned from enduring the last hard thing to help me through it.

Emily Dickinson famously called hope “the thing with feathers.” Like a beautiful bird, hope is not something to capture, cage, or hold too tight. Attachment is tricky. When I fixate on a specific outcome to whatever is troubling me, I foreclose the possibility of an even better solution.

Hope reminds me of the hummingbirds who occasionally hover by our back window or the bright flash of a cardinal in our trees. I don’t see them all the time, but they tend to pop up right when I need a burst of optimism.

What does it mean to “hold on” to hope, then?

For me, it’s this:

• Believing that leaping does not necessarily mean falling;

• Asking for and receiving support from the cosmic love force all around, an ever present shock absorber;

• Trusting in the power of renewal (aka change) as a constant, unavoidable teacher; and

• Cataloguing daily glimmers of comfort, happiness, or wonder like an avid bird watcher in a great wood.

The last few weeks I’ve had debilitating insomnia. I’ve been joking that the Universe knows I’m a night owl and so keeps assigning me the “night shift” of etheric work. After a particularly difficult, completely sleepless night, I had the distinct feeling that the reason for my wakefulness went far beyond me, as though there was something my multi-dimensional self needed to “do” elsewhere that required my human self to be awake.

Then, that afternoon, I received this incredibly validating text from a friend:

It made me cry. It made me hopeful. My job is to keep doing my Work, even when my conscious mind doesn’t fully understand all of it. When my fuel is love, it will travel where it needs to go.

All of this brought me peace, too. I’m prone to the self-imposed thought prison traditionally associated with the 8 of Swords in Tarot. I’m so grateful for hope. It’s a key I can always pick up to set myself free again.

I’d love to hear about your own relationship with hope. What does it mean to you? How do you engage with it?

Love,

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AS ABOVE, BELOW

In the deepest deep,

the farthest far,

I always know

just where you are.

Evening star

on winter sea,

bridge of light

connecting you and me.

These waves are wild,

filling you with dread.

Is there any respite?

How far ahead?

When up feels down

and sideways, too,

I’m always up here,

watching you.

I see your struggle

and feel your pain.

Inside the maelstrom,

yours to claim,

are sparkling gems

of emerald hue—

the loving wellspring

formed of you.

Heartsong of sorrow,

old and brave,

reveals to you

yourself to save.

From what? You ask.

I’ll tell you true—

from any illusion

between us two.

One and the same,

how bright we are,

lighting the way.

We’ve come so far!

Please, don’t stop now.

You’ll be okay.

Better than that,

your fears allayed.

Be bold! Reclaim!

What’s yours to know.

Keep your eyes on me:

as above, below.

—Kara Simons

This singsong poem arrived like a lullaby from my expansive spirit about the wholeness of who we really are, which can never be lost or broken. It came to me when I needed it. I’m honoring the nudge to share in case it soothes you, too.

Love,

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I’m setting aside 10 signed copies of You Belong Here for purchase bundled with a 30 minute virtual reading, to be shipped anywhere in the U.S. Your order will include two bonus vinyl stickers! (Local folks who already pre-ordered and want this package, contact me to arrange.)

Purchase Here

This offering is for anyone with the means/desire to support my small business while I figure some stuff out. I hope to have a global direct sales update soon.

I miss writing for fun without an end in mind, and I want to show up here more regularly. I’m not interested in a one-sided exchange where I ramble into the void. Engaging with you in meaningful ways brings me so much joy. I hope it’s mutual.

Today I’m pretending we’ve just sat down together at a charming coffee shop. My fingers are curved around a steaming mug of peppermint tea. What are you having?  

“It’s really nice to see you,” I say. “Tell me how you’re really doing. I’d love to hear.”

Here’s some questions I might ask you.

Where are your growth edges right now?

Are you reading books that light you up?

What is your intuition telling you today?

Talk for as long as you like—we’ve got time.

What would you like to ask me?

Love,

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After a few hours of crying, at last I believed what my body and spirit have been trying to tell me: I simply cannot handle another Kickstarter right now. It took me time (and a helpful conversation with one of my sisters) to understand these messages as self-preservation, not fear of failure. Crowdfunding is an incredible opportunity AND an agonizing amount of work.

Instead, I’m exploring options for listing my book to purchase online. Ultimately, this will benefit you, too. The price for a paperback ($22) won’t change, and you’ll get it sooner for reasonable shipping rates worldwide. I hope to make this live in May. You’ll hear it here first!

Limited Pre-Order for Local Folks

Next week I’m placing a bulk order for inventory to sell at events. Local folks who want to piggyback are welcome to pre-order.

Pre-order here for local pick-up

This window closes on Monday 5/6 at noon CDT.

When books arrive, I’ll share a few dates and times for pick-up. This includes my booth at the Iowa Metaphysical Fair on May 18-19. Entrance fee, times, and location here.

Two more reasons to attend the fair?

• Schedule a reading with me and my beloved oracle decks!

• Attend my free presentation on connecting with animal guides and nature spirits: Saturday 5/19 at 4 pm in Room B.

Why the Pivot?

Unfortunately, the margins for my book after production are tiny. The numbers just don’t work.

I haven’t shared details of the financial piece before, so here it is. I’ve committed almost three years of time and over $5,500 to this project. My part-time attorney income (and my partner) afforded me the privilege of those choices, but they are not sustainable. Last year, I reported a loss for my small business. For the last pay period at my job, I only worked eight hours so that I could focus instead on campaign and book stuff. I’m not sleeping enough, not taking care of myself. My stress is affecting my health and my relationships with my kids.

I can’t keep doing it.

I’m sharing this because I want to be real with you, not to complain or elicit sympathy. This squeeze is not unique to me! I don’t know anyone who pursues passion projects who hasn’t felt these challenges in one way or another.

Moving from crowdfunding to point-of-sale online isn’t a perfect solution, of course, but it’s the right one for me right now. In exchange for giving up a larger cut of each sale, it means someone else will handle sales taxes, customs/duties/import taxes, and all aspects of fulfillment.

This is such a relief! I want to prioritize my mental health and capacity to enjoy my watching my precious book baby enter the world. I’m so proud of it and can’t wait for you to read it.

For now, ebook and audiobook versions are off the table. That might change once I’ve had a chance to recover from this giant birthing. If you’re interested in these options, please let me know. I’m also happy to answer your questions. Thanks for taking this ride with me!

Love,

“In a world that often finds us lost to each other and to ourselves, You Belong Here is a book that celebrates communion, connection, and courage in finding our sacred place in the world and a way back to each other.”
—ELLEN ROWLAND, Author of No Small Thing

“Kara masterfully blends the mundane with the magical, inviting readers to witness the transformation that arises from listening more closely to their own heart's whispers. This book is not just a memoir; it's an invitation to journey alongside Kara’s sacred dance with life, guided by otherworldly wisdom and the relentless pursuit of personal truth. ”
—JESS SCHULER, Creator of Superlunaris Tarot

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“You Belong Here is revolutionary. I’m not finished — I’ll never be because I’ll keep reading it over and over and over. It’s going to be my new gift to anyone I love. So powerful, so relatable, so easily understood. It makes perfect sense and provides a roadmap to Ease, Joy, Fulfillment through clearly demonstrating the power of choice that we each have available to us. What could be a better gift?”

—Di Mathis

Register for notice of campaign launch

With my book’s Kickstarter coming up May 7, I’m doing and feeling so much. Lately I tend to assume it will either be a wild success or an abject failure.

I know it’s because I care about this book so damn much! I’ll never shame myself for that, but I’m also welcoming the opportunity to heal another layer of duality inside me.

This week, reflecting on how attachment, acceptance, and allowing feel different in my body helped me regain center.

• Attachment: Fixating on a specific outcome. Feels like I’m holding that future in a tightly closed fist, foreclosing other possibilities, and stuck.

• Acceptance: More neutral and open, but still expressing as passive resignation most of the time. Feels like, “I have no ability to influence the outcome so why bother trying?”

• Allowing: Doing what I can because I trust myself and the Universe, whatever happens. When I catch this wave, I feel free and light. I’m learning to surf with both hands out, palms open to receive.

Can you relate? How do you experience these ideas?

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Kickstarter Rewards + Add-Ons

Regaining faith in the process through allowing means I’m having fun building out our campaign.

Main Reward Tiers:

• Paperback - $22

• Ebook - $12

Shipping will be charged after the campaign. I’m optimistic for June delivery but listing July out of an abundance of caution.

Add-Ons Include:

• Prairie Majesty Oracle - $22

• Song of the Grandmothers - $50

• 30 minute oracle reading - $50

• Six months of readings - $240

• Virtual workshop with Grandmother Spider meditation - $20

• Upgrade to signed paperback - $8 (For those who want to contribute extra support.)

Something folks may not know is 10% of all campaign funding goes to fees. My cost to produce one paperback is higher than for an oracle deck, but the market price is significantly lower. Unfortunately, this makes my margins tiny, and I can’t really afford to offer discounts. I’m open to ideas for adding value to your rewards!

My campaign goal of $4,000 will allow me to order books, pay the illustrator, and reserve a small amount for taxes and incidentals. It won’t reimburse the thousands I’ve invested or my time. I’m okay with this or I wouldn’t be pursuing it. But gosh, it would be great to keep pursuing my creative projects without stress.

My biggest dream is to raise enough to fund an audiobook. This will be our most important stretch goal. I would love the chance to read to you! This weekend, I’m recording a sample chapter that you’ll be able to preview.

Below I’ve included slides that provide an overview of how Kickstarter works, in case it’s new to any of you. I welcome suggestions and questions in comments.

I’m sending so much love to you! And to all of the college students who are bravely pushing back in protest. What’s happening in Palestine is not a war: it’s a genocide. I pray for ceasefire and relief for all who suffer. We have the opportunity to co-create a different world, and this book is one way I’m showing up.

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Today it’s how I’m celebrating the journey behind You Belong Here, one month before my May 7 Kickstarter campaign.

I hope this letter feels like I’m speaking to you, too.

I hope you know how capable you are.

I hope you feel the loving thread that connects everything you are and what you’re here to do.

Follow it and keep going.

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Dear small Kara,

Do you know how much I love you? I wouldn’t be here today, doing the things I’m doing and living the life I’m living, without you. Thank you for weathering the storms as best you can. It’s really important for us to learn So Many Things. You’re doing great.

I know it’s hard for you to believe this, to feel proud of yourself. Don’t worry—you’ll dissolve this cage when you’re ready.

Trust the timing of your unfolding like a blush rose trusts its bloom. Your secret heart, full of tenderness and sensitive feelings, is precious. You’ll protect it until you realize: You don’t need to anymore. This part of you is meant to be seen and shared.

Here's the thing about opening up. You will be astonished, shocked even, by how nourishing it is to lay yourself bare. Self-liberation is expansive and addictive. All the things you shame about your life? Owning up to who you are and what happens, even the most difficult chapters, will set you free.

You will cry because it feels so good. I promise.

You’ll learn to recognize your inside voice, to know the cadence and timbre of the song you were born to sing. When you let it out, you’ll discover new ways to harmonize with the Love that expresses through everything, if only we let ourselves hear it and believe it.

Along the way, you’ll have no choice but to walk through dark valleys. Sometimes you’ll feel so alone that you question every true thing you’ve ever learned. You’ll doubt yourself and almost give up. In those moments, remember I’m holding out my hand and reaching for you. We’re a team, you and me. And we’ve got things to do.

Everything is already working out, even when it doesn’t seem that way. Your future is full of possibility.

Love,

Kara

P.S. Don’t forget to unstring your bow now and then. Your aim will be better for it. You’ll find lots of people to laugh with when you slow down—people who love you and accept you and cheer for you. Bask in the warmth and return it tenfold.

What do you want your younger self to know today?

Upcoming Events:

Free Guided Meditation

• 4/17 at 10 am at The Brenton Arboretum

• Part of “Experience Nature’s Healing”

Iowa Metaphysical Fair

• 5/18 to 5/19 at the Iowa State Fairgrounds

• One of the largest events of its kind and my first time participating! Come for a reading and pick up unique gifts for yourself and others.

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For January, “Hold out your hand” had me asking for and receiving help for You Belong Here, my upcoming book, in every quarter—from proofreader to graphic designer to fellow author endorsements.

My February omen is much less fun: “Intentionally participate in your healing. Allow it to unfold without control.” Earlier this week, I was even counting how many days until February is over because I’m ready to finish this assignment.

One of the spiral themes I’m walking this lifetime is dissolving intense, overwhelming fear that arises from health issues for myself or my kids. Usually it’s completely disproportionate to my lived reality of what’s happening.

Maybe you can relate? I’m sure I’m not alone in this. I suspect ancestral memories in my DNA and past life experiences both make this issue super charged for me.

What helps me navigate this is understanding myself as a multi-dimensional being.

My book goes deeper into this topic. For our purposes today, I’ll keep it simple.

With time and practice, I’ve learned to hold awareness of different aspects of myself and pay attention to which one is dominant. These include human Kara and my expansive consciousness (the part of me that is eternal). Health issues are oh-so-triggering for human Kara.

For all the years I’ve been cultivating this multi-dimensional understanding, human Kara’s panic overrides everything else for pockets of time when health issues arise. This experience is extremely physical for me. It can include nausea, stomach upset, loss of appetite, insomnia, and/or waves of tingly heat or cold that flood my system.

Mentally, this brings brain fog, disconnection, anxiety, and/or decision paralysis.

Emotionally and spiritually, it might include feeling abandoned, cut-off from Source/God, ashamed (because I’m not keeping myself or my kids safe), and/or unable to feel hope.

Of course, with every experience, the duration of my panic state lessens. However, until this month, there was always at least some stretch of time when my panic state would completely take over.

When one of my daughters was sick for a week with high fever, I noticed something really important. Even though this activated my human fear per usual, for the first time this fear never obscured the Me who operates from my expansive consciousness.

It didn’t happen because I ignored or dismissed or shamed my fear. It’s because my hard-won, longtime practice of befriending and absorbing my fear is working. I’ve intentionally chosen to embody and operate from my expansive consciousness enough times that this anchor inside me is stronger than ever.

I still have work to do, let’s be honest.

There were moments when almost 50% of me felt the human panic—but it never crossed that line. I was able even inside those moments to KNOW that the larger Me would find her/our way through. This gave me confidence to trust what my Knowing and my daughter’s Knowing were telling me. It was easier to make choices, be present instead of trying to micromanage everything, and reassure my daughter, knowing this would pass.

It also highlighted more than ever before my extreme privilege in having access to everything I need and broke my heart knowing that this is not the reality for so many. I continue to support a permanent ceasefire in Gaza and establishment of a Palestinian state free from decades of oppression.

Once my daughter was in the clear, some stuff happened that concerns my health. (I don’t want you to worry—I’m okay.)

It became critical to feel everything this activated in my body, even though it was super scary to acknowledge how afraid I felt. I’m still too close to the experience to break down the percentage of how much of this I perceived from human panic or my expansive consciousness.

But that brings me to the point of my essay today. Thanks for sticking with me. You already know I can’t tell a story in a straight line.

This week gave me a breakthrough I’m hoping will be useful for you, too.

The key for shifting out of fear around my health is something I’m always telling my kids when something happens that upsets them:

• This is just information.

• It’s not your fault. You don’t need to be ashamed or scared of it.

• What is it trying to tell you?

For example:

• If one of my girls receives a lower grade than she hoped for, we discuss how that grade does not define anything about her. It’s just information. It tells her where she’s still learning. Maybe there was a question she didn’t read carefully enough, which reminds her to take her time in the future. Maybe there was something she didn’t understand as well as she thought, which tells us to revisit it together at home.

• A recent dentist visit revealed one of my girls is more prone to plaque and tartar build-up than the others and must be more diligent about brushing for a full two minutes. She felt bad that her sisters didn’t get the same lecture. It’s just information. This is her body telling her, “I need something to change. Here’s the best way you can support me and take care of me.”

Applying this to my own health concerns is such a powerful antidote to fear.

My body is telling me right now to prioritize rest, movement, and nourishment. For years, one consistent thing I hear from people who know me as a lawyer, creative, friend, or relative have all said, “I don’t know how you do everything.”

The truth is: I don’t—not without sacrificing my health.

This week gave me a wake-up call. I’ve been running on adrenaline for years, and my body is OVER IT. Instead of panicking about the information I received from my body, I need neutrality (which I source from my expansive consciousness) so that I can pay attention to what it’s offering me.

I’m only a few days into shifting some things, but I already feel better. I’ve also scheduled medical appointments without the fear this usually activates in me. I’m ready for even more information because I want and need to take better care of myself.

My body is designed to die just like it was designed to live. It knows how. It’s normal and natural for my body to change as I age. My job is to support my body, not resist this process.

How’s this landing for you? Can you relate? You know I love to hear from you in the comments.

Love,

P.S. If this post resonated, would you “like” it and consider sharing with your people? Every little bit helps my reach and means so much. <3

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AND BUT TOO I fully acknowledge my tremendous privilege in being able to focus on this project instead of trying to keep myself and my family alive. If you only have spoons to answer one ask right now, please let it be on behalf of those who are suffering in Palestine, Congo, Sudan, and elsewhere.

What motivates me to publish my book in a world on fire (which it has been for some time, let’s be honest) is the hope that my story will help someone else. It’s the book I wish I’d had in 2012 when I woke up to the false belief bubble I’d been in since childhood.

The “pop” was really painful. It always is. Maybe you know already?

Yet without it, I’d never have found the door inside me, the one that opens to the otherworld. In time, I reclaimed a belonging there so powerful, so wild, so life-affirming, that I grew desperate to write everything down, to shine a beacon for others to remember that they, too, have an inherent place in the cosmic spiderweb. To know that our unconditional belonging connects us to a vast network of support and illuminates our paths on Earth.

You Belong Here is a self-help memoir that deconstructs our innate belonging via my mystical, messy, human journey. It unfolds at the intersection of non-denominational spirituality and motherhood to meet the rising tide of folks (parents or not) who yearn to trust themselves over external authority and ask: “Where do I fit? What am I to do with it?”

To claim my innate belonging and purpose here, I had to feel it there, in the otherworld. On the lap of the Great Mother, she of endless faces and names, I’m always held between sea and star. I believe you are, too.

In the realm where imagination and spirit dance, I gathered proof: we’re never separate from the center of loving intelligence or the many beings whose friendship supports our unique roles inside the anthill of the Universe. With the help of Raven, Grandmother Spider, Ant, and many others, I learned to trust myself as a bridge between and get to work.

Using the framework of a nine-year cycle in my life, You Belong Here empowers readers to know themselves this way, too. I weave together intimate stories, practical tips, insights from otherworldly friends, and journaling exercises for excavating personal identity, security, and purpose.

I intimately understand the heartbreak (and wild joy!) of self-liberation. Abandoning the Mormon theology I was raised in triggered years of detox and self-doubt alongside harrowing physical experiences. Dreams and meditations became portals to learn from nature and ancestor spirits about the Love that always holds us.

Then Bartholomew, a Pleiadian star being, challenged me to do what scared me most: own all of my story out loud.

Writing everything down was difficult and exhilarating. Sending my words into the world is proving to be much the same! And that’s where you come in, if you’re up for it.

April 11 Campaign Launch

Indie creatives like me rely on crowdfunding campaigns to get our projects off the ground. In March, I’ll share a primer for how it works and how to receive notice when my You Belong Here campaign launches on April 11.

If everything goes to plan, backers should receive books in June!

I love the excitement, momentum, and community-building of this process. It is also a huge amount of work behind the scenes, alongside the myriad decisions of indie publishing. The folks I hired to typeset my book are fast at work, and it goes to my proofreader next. IT’S ALL VERY EXCITING.

Today I assigned myself a crucial task: overcoming my nerves to ask you for help. I don’t take lightly the honor of being in your inbox and have no doubt that you, like me, are also navigating a lot in your life right now.

Nevertheless, here goes . . .

Will you join my launch team?

What’s involved:

• In the lead-up to my 4/11 campaign, you’ll receive exclusive access to the Introduction + Chapter 1 of my book.

• Assuming you’re intrigued (fingers crossed so tight), I’ll make slides available to share with your circles (endorsements, photos of the book, quotes, campaign details).

• I’ll also encourage you to share with friends and family via word-of-mouth.

• If you have an active online platform, newsletter, or podcast, I’d love to chat about doing an interview or IG live.

What’s in it for you:

• My heartfelt gratitude (truly, madly, deeply).

• Snail mail thank you card.

• Invitation to a virtual journey meditation experience with me in April (date TBD).

• Sneak peek of campaign tiers and add-ons.

• Coupon for one Song of the Grandmothers oracle at 50% off MSRP (sale price of $30).

If you're in, tell me here!

You can also drop me a comment below, and I’ll reach out.

The truth is, nothing I do is possible without you. Whatever your capacity, please know: I sincerely appreciate you. Every spark of connection we share feeds the flame of why I do this work. It’s my contribution of magic, warmth, and encouragement. It keeps me going inside the heartache of this world.

Love,

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How are you? I’ve wanted to write you for weeks now. One of my goals is to connect here more often. I’m grateful for our space together.

My second Omen Days experience was just as magical as the first. Last year, the accuracy of my monthly omens astonished me.

The Omen Days is an Celtic practice that invites us to watch for signs on each of the 12 days from December 26 to January 6. Those signs become omens—a road map of sorts for the 12 months of the upcoming year. I learned about it from Irish poet and activist Laura Murphy in late 2022.

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I used my Notes app to record each day. It felt somewhat chaotic because I hosted 22 family members (half slept elsewhere) for many of those days. Of course, this proved to be fruitful, too. Curious? Read on!

January 2024: ”Hold out your hand.”

• This phrase arrived about midnight, just as the day turned. I was having trouble falling asleep. My right hand was under my pillow like always as I lay on my right side. Suddenly, I felt someone holding my hand from the beyond. As I paid attention, pulsing sensations increased throughout my palm and the backside of my fingers. Is this my first omen? I felt a strong “Yes” from beyond. Then the phrase, “Hold out your hand,” dropped into my awareness.

• What does this mean to me?

  • ASK for what you want and BELIEVE there will be an answer.

  • Open to receive. Accept the flow of abundance.

  • Alongside this, reach out to others. Offer help and support. “Take my hand, I’ve got you.”

February 2024: “Intentionally participate in your healing. Allow it to unfold without control.”

• The signs I synthesized:

  • Eight of cups card from Story Medicine Tarot second edition “Animal Medicine Woman,” which says “I follow my healing.”

  • Before that, I perceived the phrase, “Be like the rain and fall.”

March 2024: “Allow others the care and feeding of their own dreams. Don’t take them on or stand in the way.”

• My sign: I’d dreamed about having a fourth baby, a son named Oliver. I forgot about him and left him at the hospital. (Yikes. Awake me would never!)

• When we brought him home, my husband was really happy.

• I realized I didn’t feel attached and didn’t want to sacrifice my body/sleep by breastfeeding. I realized it would be just fine if Mark took over and did bottles. At first I felt guilty about this, but I was able to let it go right before I woke up.

April 2024: Launch my book campaign April 11!

• My signs:

  • I grew teary reading a beautiful children’s picture book called Mother of Sharks by Melissa Cristina Márquez. The author recounts her childhood relationship with the ocean and experiences an imaginal vision. In it, she interacts with her future self—now a renowned shark scientist—who encourages her little girl self to pursue her dream. The setting and emotion reminded me of the vision I share in my book introduction.

  • After my sister-in-law read the book, she told me, “This makes me think of you, Kara! It reminds me of how I feel listening to your meditations.”

• When I synthesized these as a sign I should launch my campaign in April, the date “April 11” immediately dropped into my mind.

May 2024
“Curl into cozy comfort.”

• My sign: Waking up early, nestling back into the covers and feeling relaxed, safe, well, able to sink into the comfort of it (instead of being unable to go back to sleep like it’s been of late).

• It’s how I felt after finishing finals in college and law school.

• Something hard is done and it’s time to rest.

June 2024: “Start now. Just do the things.”

• My signs: Feeling of presence and forward momentum throughout the day.

  • Talking to my brother about a difficult time in our childhood, which I’ve wanted to do for months.

  • Instigating card pulls with my siblings and their significant others on New Year’s Eve.

  • My sister’s attitude after we quickly ate the cake she’d made. “No big deal. I’ll just make another cake.”

July 2024: “Refresh. Reset. Clarity.”

• My signs:

  • Feeling emotional fog, discontent.

  • Noticing the bracing air and rejuvenation of the winter night sky when I took out the trash.

  • Instantly feeling better.

August 2024: “Open up.”

• My signs:

  • Various vulnerable conversations with visiting family members.

  • Marathoning to reset my house after they started heading home and not listening to my body or taking breaks to eat.

• This phrase feels like it has multiple meanings that will be relevant: Opening up to listen to myself and inviting intimacy with others.

September 2024: “Actively protect what is sacred to you without competition, scarcity, or comparison.”

• My signs:

  • Pulling Meadowlark and Box Turtle from Prairie Majesty Oracle.

  • Seeing hawks!

October 2024: “Make time for pleasure and what nourishes you.”

• My signs:

  • Seeing more hawks, who tell me to be intentional and get after what I want.

  • This encouraged me to prioritize a favorite walk instead of rushing home to get things done.

  • It was exactly what I needed! Cottonwood energy lifted my spirits, along with the lake, sky, geese, ducks.

November 2024: “Watch for the calm after the storm.”

• My signs: Nothing in particular. I simply felt these words come through.

December 2024: “Take aim and let your arrow fly.”

• My signs:

  • Feeling overwhelmed by everything I must do to launch my book campaign April 11.

  • My bestie encouraged me to be flexible if it would ease my stress. Which is normally what I need to hear!

  • But this time felt different. Instead, the analogy came to me that I needed to commit to *that* date like a target.

  • My commitment is the equivalent of letting my arrow fly.

  • Then my job is to trust the momentum, trust the wind, trust my arrow will fly true. If I waffle on the date, it feels like I’d be stuck there for ages.

  • Realizing all of this and saying it out loud helped my overwhelm dissipate. It reminded me of my intentions and their power.  

I’ve got to fly for now. I hope you’ll tell me about your Omen Days experiences (and anything else you like) in comments.

Love,

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What a treat to write you this Christmas morning. By some miracle, my kids are still asleep—or at least they were when I started this!

I hope you’re well and safe. I hope you’re able to enjoy pockets of joy, peace, and ease during this holiday season, however you celebrate and whatever personal/collective heartaches you’re feeling. If you’re holding the both/and, I’m right there with you.

Tomorrow, December 26, marks the start of the Omen Days, an ancient Celtic practice that I learned about in 2022 from Laura Murphy.

I highly recommend following Laura at @everose if you’re on Instagram. She’s an Irish poet and passionate advocate whose ongoing amplification of Palestinian voices and curation of evidence about the truth of what’s happening in Gaza and West Bank is excellent.

The Omen Days practice originates in Celtic lore that views the 12 days from December 26 to January 6 as a portal.

As Laura explains it:

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Signs are everywhere! Two keys: pay attention + trust your instincts.  

Last year, I received signs from a variety of sources: nature observations, direct communication with my guides, pulling cards. Sometimes a synthesis of seemingly random images and words that stood out to me throughout the day.

The best part for me? Tuning into my larger Knowing to understand each sign.

Here’s where I landed for 2023.

JANUARY: Ground physical work in aligned, decisive action.

FEBRUARY: Rebirth and hope.

MARCH: Normalizing change to protect growth.

APRIL: Stripping bare offers clarity of sight.

MAY: Stop. Notice. Gather resources.

JUNE: Untapped potential.

JULY: Feel how you are held.

AUGUST: Open to possibility.

SEPTEMBER: Homecoming. What you do in January will land.

OCTOBER: Hidden messages revealed through exposure to heat.

NOVEMBER: Reassurance. Whatever you’re worried about—don’t.

DECEMBER: Reflect in stillness. Flashes of unexpected insight.

Suffice it to say—these omens were spot on, but not always in the way I predicted.

For example:

I anticipated I’d find a publishing home for my book by September. That didn’t happen. In September, I also postponed my second retreat. Both huge disappointments, if I’m honest.

And yet!

The effect of what did not happen in September ultimately resulted in the same kind of “aligned, decisive action” I experienced in January—in essence, a homecoming.

Not least of which is this: I’ve decided to publish my book myself.

Although the wind began blowing in this direction earlier, it took the “hidden messages revealed through exposure to heat” of October for me to accept it.

Releasing my lingering attachment to the dream of traditional publishing was the kind of hard that feels easy in hindsight. I had to be honest with myself: why did I want it so much?

Validation, of course.

I wanted the industry to brand my writing, to brand me, as worthy. Ugh, it was yuck to see inside myself where this thread still bound me. Ironically (and naturally), failure set me free.

My limited attempts to query agents revealed I was unlikely to succeed without pouring an agonizing amount of time and energy into growing an online platform. Although I received compliments about my skill, I don’t have an established audience that ensures an agent + publisher would make money off me. I get that. It’s a business.

When I took the time to be still inside—to listen to myself and get clear about what I really want—that’s not it.

Yes, I want to reach as many people as possible. Yes, I want to continue growing.

But trying to build a mega-platform and then devoting myself to the marketing (because that is the expectation on authors these days) in order to ultimately profit a company more than myself? That’s not the path I actually want.

It feels amazing to take ownership of every choice for my book: from the cover to the interior design to the paper quality to the timeline, it’s all up to me. I’m tentatively hoping to launch a campaign in the spring or summer. Frankly, I’m hoping my Omen Days for 2024 will guide this process.

I’ve also got another oracle deck planned. Hooray!

This year taught me to center my work outside social media, although I am immensely grateful for and will continue to cultivate treasured connections with folks in far-flung places. I appreciate all of you very much!

What I know now more than ever is this: face-to-face interaction at events, retreats, and my newly established (free!) community circle are vital to my work. These seeds need my attention. I’m hopeful they’ll blossom into more virtual offerings if there’s interest.

There’s so much more I’d like to say, but everyone woke up awhile ago, and today will be busy. Tomorrow six of my seven siblings arrive in Iowa. We’ve been prepping like mad! I can’t wait for the cozy chaos of 22 people in my house for the next week (though half will sleep elsewhere).

Thank you for being part of my day! I’m sending you love.

Upcoming Events:

Register by January 3

January 7: Nature Collage workshop

Please join us!

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How will we end it?

How will we dismantle every system and structure of harm?

How will we find each other’s hands to hold when everywhere is darkness and fog?

I’m reaching mine to find yours. I’m saying I’m sorry for all the hurt I’ve ever caused, for all the times I’ve been unwilling to see your pain. I’m praying for Love to hold us all.

Last night in meditation I felt myself dropped into the middle of the deepest ocean at night, no moon or stars to guide the way. As I sank into the cool, black water, I thought of all the sharks and whales and sea creatures lurking in the depth below me.

And I realized they are not who I fear.

They welcomed me into their home, into a womb-like peace that I wish I could feel all the time. I’m telling you to remind myself it was real and to return as needed. May we all find the place within where peace lives, still, amidst the horrors in this world.

I’ve been focusing on Instagram to amplify the voices of everyone calling for ceasefire and ending the genocide in Gaza, including the many Palestinians who are literally begging us to share, to use our voices to help them. As of now, most of them can’t post because internet and phone services are down—a complete blackout while indiscriminate bombing intensifies.

It’s terrifying to imagine what’s happening as I write.

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In her NYT editorial, “The Palestinian Double Standard,” Palestinian author Halya Alyan wrote (emphasis mine):

“I don’t hesitate for a second to condemn the killing of any child, any massacre of civilians — this of course includes Jewish life. It is the easiest ask in the world. And it is not in spite of that but because of that I say: Condemn the brutalization of bodies. By all means, do. Condemn murder. Condemn violence, imprisonment, all forms of oppression. But if your shock and distress comes only at the sight of certain brutalized bodies? If you speak out but not when Palestinian bodies are besieged and murdered, abducted and imprisoned? Then it is worth asking yourself which brutalization is acceptable to you, even quietly, even subconsciously, and which is not.

“Name the discrepancy and own it. If you can’t be equitable, be honest.

“There is nothing complicated about asking for freedom. Palestinians deserve equal rights, equal access to resources, equal access to fair elections and so forth. If this makes you uneasy, then you must ask yourself why.”

I greatly respect the actions of Jewish Voice for Peace (“the largest progressive Jewish anti-Zionist organization in the world”) in calling for ceasefire and actively protesting the U.S. government’s complicity:

“The events of the past several weeks have made clear what we have always known: The lives of Palestinians and Israelis are intertwined, and safety can only come from justice, equality and freedom for all.

“We feel visceral relief at the reunions of four Israeli hostages with their families. It reminds us what we are fighting for: That every single civilian — Palestinian and Israeli — should be able to live safely in their homes, with their families by their sides, without fear. May this be a model for the preservation, through diplomacy, of each and every precious life right now.

“The only way forward is a ceasefire.

“We’ve been saying ceasefire every day of this horrifying time, so we want to get specific. We are calling for our elected officials, including President Biden, to demand the following:

1. Demand that the Israeli government immediately cease its bombing of Gaza.

1. Allow all life-saving humanitarian needs to enter Gaza, including water, fuel, food and medicine.

2. Begin direct negotiations for Israeli hostages.

“The Israeli bombardment and siege of Gaza have wiped out entire families, or have left only one or two survivors to carry the memory of generations. Thousands more are trapped under the rubble. Across Gaza, there is no more fuel to operate rescue equipment, and hospitals have run out of electricity. Millions of Palestinians in Gaza are facing a genocidal military onslaught with nowhere to turn. Thousands of Palestinians have been arrested by Israel since October 7, doubling the number of Palestinian political prisoners in Israel in two weeks. The lives of the more than 200 remaining Israeli hostages in Gaza are also in imminent risk from Israel’s indiscriminate air strikes, and families are anxiously awaiting the return of their loved ones.

“But Israeli government officials have made it painfully clear: They are more intent on carrying out genocidal violence against the 2.2 million Palestinians living in Gaza than on negotiating for the lives of Israeli hostages.

“There is no military solution. We demand no more grieving families, and a ceasefire now to save lives.

Source: No more grieving families in Palestine and Israel (JVP).

More resources below.

With love,

• On the Dehumanization of the Palestinians (10/23/23 Institute for Palestinian Studies)

• Proliferation of Online Hate and Racism Against Palestinian and Jewish Communities and Censorship of Palestinian Content (10/27/23 Amnesty International)

• Why Gaza Is An Open Air Prison (6/22/22 Human Rights Watch)

• On my TBR list: The Hundred Years' War on Palestine: A History of Settler Colonialism and Resistance, 1917–2017 by Rashid Khalidi

• If you’re on Instagram, brilliant beacon Adrienne Maree Brown shared an incredibly moving, heartrending live today, asking us to join in “prayers and spells and love to Gaza.”

P.S. If you’re interested in sharing space together (both in-person and online), I’ve recently updated my website with upcoming events, women’s community circle registration, reading pop-ups, and my retreat with Dena Fife in January 2024.

More specifically, Jester Park Nature Center opened a few more slots to accommodate interest in my 11/6 Journey with Raven workshop. I’d love to see you.

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Want to try it?

Below is my synthesis, paraphrased from what Gail taught me and how I’ve incorporated it into my life.

Close your eyes. Take deep belly breaths in a rhythm that feels good to you.

Imagine you’re standing in front of the other person or idea.

How does the space between you feel? Notice whether any cords connect you. Are they draining you or pulling you where you do not want to go?

Love does not mean passively allowing others to siphon your life force or control/influence you! Everyone deserves healthy boundaries and mutual respect.

To restore balance, say to the other person or idea:

“I take my power back.” Repeat until this feel true. For cords you don’t want going from you to the other person/idea, visualize them retracting back to you, dissolving, or breaking with the force of your intention.

“I give you back your power.” Repeat until this feels true. For cords you don’t want coming to you from the other person/idea, visualize them retracting to the other person, dissolving, or breaking with the force of your intention.

Feel better? I love this practice as a simple and effective tool.

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October Card Spread

I’ve been using this spread a lot lately! It works great with any tarot or oracle decks you have on hand.

If you happen to have Prairie Majesty Oracle and Song of the Grandmothers, I recommend using PMO for all of the placements plus an emotional support Grandmother under each column, like I did in the above photo.

If you try it, you know I want to hear about it! Tag me on Instagram: @joyful_resonance

October Events

Hey hey it’s my birthday month! Watch for my upcoming Instagram giveaways to celebrate.

Meanwhile, I’ve got several in-person events:

• Monday, October 9: Women’s Community Circle at Meadowlark Clinic from 6-8 pm. NOW FULL - Contact me to join the waitlist. Registration for November/December will be posted 10/10.

• Friday, October 13: Reading Pop-Up at Kays Spiritual Ways from 2-5 pm.

• Saturday, October 28: Reading Pop-Up at Art Terrarium from 2-5 pm.

Wishing you a great weekend. How are you enjoying the transition to fall (or spring if you’re in the southern hemisphere)? Tell me about your favorite cozy comfort!

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